Girls, In the confines of a relationship do you prefer your man to be energetic and take the lead or be laid back and a listener?

I'm energetic and have been told I have a good personality. When I go out with female and male friends I'm social and kinda lead the group. When I go on a a fate I become super reserved and chill. Then I'll let the girl lead conversation and become a listener. I'm not dominant when with a girl I really like and I've had girls tell me their not used to seeing me act like that. I always thought girls prefer to be with guys who will listen and let them get their ideas out. I'm starting to think I women like me better when I'm louder.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree with @willow74 -I like a compromise. I want a guy who listens to me, but it is INCREDIBLY nerve-wracking to try anything with a guy who just kinda passively lets things happen. I'm guessing that what happens with you might be that you're asking out women who are used to seeing you social and energetic, and who like that version of you and are thrown for a loop when they go on a date with you, and you're acting totally differently.

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What Girls Said 12

  • Good question. I'm a listener and I don't provide input unless if it's necessary or someone is asking for advice. I can also take the lead as well depending on how I feel. I guess someone that's just as balanced as I am would be a preference.

    Really quiet guys aren't interesting when I have to PULL conversations from them and over-talkative guys are annoying.

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  • I prefer someone who can be a bit aggressive and can take the lead. I'm currently seeing someone who is shy and quiet, but is only bold once in a blue moon and it's pretty bland at the moment.

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    • I never like to be agressive so I may be screwed. I'm a loud person by nature and as a result in a relationship I'm looking to be a listener.

  • Aggressive /lead definitely!

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  • I prefer a listening laid back guy.
    Im pretty anxious and I talk a lot, and like a guy who's more 'chill'

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  • Energetic! I love a guy who like to take risks and have adventures!

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  • i'd much prefer it if the conversation flowed naturally without us having to decide who says what and when.

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    • Well girls say they dont know why I change when alone and ask what's wrong and I don't have an answer. Im just differint in a relationship.

    • do you get shy when you're alone with a woman?

    • No I'll talk but I like to talk about other peoples issues and be understandkng not be agressive or talk. more than the girl.

  • Neither. I want him to be both, because I'm both. It varies day by day.

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  • They're probably just surprised. Try not to have such a complete change. Be confident and dominant when you're alone too, just not as much. And be prepared to listen and let her lead if she wants to. Every girl is different.

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  • I like a dominant guy who takes the lead.

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    • I never have been that type in a relationship I always show my quiet soft side. I guess I want to be able to relax once In whoke which I would like to do with a girl.

    • That's good but you shouldn't let the conversation get stuck and you should be outspoken about your ideas. At least that's the kind of guy I like

  • It depends on the day

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  • I personally like a guy who's a good listener and little aggressive and little dominant. You know " A man who know how to be a man"
    Have a balanced approach.

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  • Laid back listener.

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