Should I text him again? How much space do I give him?

So, I met this guy at a mutual friends' wedding. He was a groomsman, I was a bridesmaid. We hit it off really well but due to end of wedding cleanup choas we didn't get to exchange numbers. I friended him on FB, we passed a few messages back and forth. During this time I met up with the groom who told me that the guy was going through a lot right now ( his mom has cancer and is terminal). He knew I'd understand as I've already been through the whole taking care of a dying parent/ death of parent cycle, which I do.
So, we finally met up about 2 weeks after the wedding. We had a nice night and chatted. told him about my experiences and he opened up a bit about what he's going through and that he's basically working 6 days a week. We went back to my place and made out. He didn't want to have sex as " he doesn't know what he's going to feel from day to day" and didn't want to set up any expectations. I told him that I have no expectations but he did need to be honest with me and with himself. We left it agreeing that we liked each other and that he'd "see me next week"
Since then, one late night message (responding to me saying "have a good long weekend", he was taking his mom on a road trip) saying that he was thinking about me and he was looking forward to resting. I wrote back that he should text me when he was back in town, maybe I could cook dinner.
It has now been a week and I've heard nothing. Did I scare him off by telling him I would cook for him? Do I wait patiently as I know he's really busy and in a very emotionally confusing place right now? Do I just give up on ever connecting with him again? In the end, whether we end up dating or not, I now see him as a friend and just want to let him know that I'm there for him should he need anything.
Any help would be great. Is this a " Girl, stop your crazy and let that boy be!" situation or a " Text him once more, offer support, and see what happens" situation?

  • text/message on facebook
    100% (3)67% (4)78% (7)Vote
  • don't text and let the boy alone
    0% (0)33% (2)22% (2)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Let it breathe. You don't need to text him. He knows you're there, that you care, can relate, and are open to getting together when the time is right. No need to push or even remind him you are there. Just let the time come to him. If it does, then great. If not (which I doubt), then let that be as well. What will be, will be, and all good things come in their own good time. If not with him, then with whomever it is supposed to be with, and whenever it is supposed to be. :)

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    • Thank you for MHO :) I can relate to you both, as I recently lost my own dad, and know sometimes life is a challenge that you need time or space to grow through, or to heal from. In any case, that guy is extremely lucky to have such a thoughtful friend as you.

What Guys Said 3

  • It is not a leave him alone thing hon. As you said and already know he has a lot on his plate right now ( what I call a head full of bad wiring lol ) but it honestly will mean a lot to him to get an up beat message during this tough time ( I know it would help me anyway. If you do like this guy and it sounds like you might , just settle for being friends and maybe add in the message that the offer to cook still stands when he gets the chance ; that way he knows that your still good with doing that but doesn't come off as being a pressured thing. Good luck young Lady

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  • whoa wait... he's mom has cancer... he needs space atm :)

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  • Leave him alone.

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What Girls Said 3

  • This is hard! Your best bet may be to just give him some space and once in a while send him a message to inquire how he is doing. Make sure to tell him that you are there if he needs to talk about anything since you have gone through the same thing. Also, the time you keep in touch with him should depend on how much you like him and really want to pursue something with him. Dont waste your time on him if he doesn't open up within a few months.

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  • Yes just hit him up

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  • Just text him!

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