Should I tell the guy next date?

the bill is on me? Last Saturday I went with a guy that I been struggling to go out for the over 2 months since we met. The thing is that first during the time of scheduling the date whcih had to be reschedule like 3 times, in one of those times the guy very honest told me he did not have money. I guess when he meant that is that he did not ahve money to invite me, maybe he had money for him but not for me, so each pay our respective meals. The thing is that the same day of the date some hours later while we were arranging the time of him picking me up at my sister house. He once again told me something like. Let me tell you I dont have much money. I told him dont worry each pay for our own meals, he was that open. I mean in any moment the guy told me while I met him directly he was going to invite me we just arranged to hang out. But you know how society and etiquette goes that the first date the man pays. But I was not even thinking of that anyway, he pretty ws clear to me that each one pay for our own food I had no problem on that. I guess he felt like obligated to invite me because that is what most guys do when they date a lady specially on the first date and Im sure he had done that in the past, I assume.

The thing is that I was willing to pay my thing. At the end of the meal at the restaurant upps surprised he pay for the whole thing with his credit card, I could not even have time like to even tell him when they brought us the bill, I will pay my part, I felt bad because he may assume I took advantage so I let him pay. But the lady give us the bill and the guy pull ouyt his card on the bill. Now if we go out the next time (either movies or meals or anything) should I tell h im something, that this time is on me at least or we better continue paying our respective something or anything? He is 42 years old. Im 44

Updates:
Next date is on me he alreayd clarified me when we text yesterday and I said sure

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Could be a lot of things.. Maybe he was testing to see if you were a girl who's just out for a free meal? Maybe he's had bad experiences with that in the past? Maybe he really does not have much money. Who really knows? In either case, don't let it bother you so much, because whatever the case was, he liked you enough to pay for the meal even after saying what he did. Just try to schedule another date and tell him it's on you if you like him. I think you do seeing as how you wrote all of this.

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    • Yes I do like this guy and I want to get to know him better. I not marrying him soon or settle with him but I do want to hang out iwth him often if he is willing also do hang out with me. I know that if I want to pursue more wtih him marriage and kids are off subjects to him cause it seems he has no plan to marry or have kids in near future cause he does not want to loose his independence and the free time he has to do the things he wants to do with no responsability to get in the way.

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    • It's too early to think about that now. Just focus on getting to know him better and see where it leads. Who knows where you'll both end up? Call him and tell him you want to take him out to so and so restaurant on you.

    • In order not to sound so clingy saying to him I will liek to take him out I may suggest him instead in a more casual way if he likes movies or theater so we can go. Dont you think?

What Guys Said 3

  • Yeah next time before you leave you can tell him that you would like to pay for at least your part of the meal or even the whole date

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    • I guess I will do I feel bad he paid you know cause I was ready to pay my part and then upps he paid it all and I did nto even have time to tell him no.

    • Yeah I would feel bad as well if a girl I took on a date did the same thing.

  • You are in your mid forties, I think you could ask him out and just say, "my treat" and things would go okay. Perhaps choose a venue that doesn't cost money? Picnic? Trip to the beach? Visit an arboretum or a park? If he is into it, hiking or something like that can be a lot of fun.

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  • i have some idea... how bout suggestin him meetin him wid his friends and yer friends as well?

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    • Why you say that?

    • Yes I do like this guy and I want to get to know him better. I not marrying him soon or settle with him but I do want to hang out iwth him often if he is willing also do hang out with me. I know that if I want to pursue more wtih him marriage and kids are off subjects to him cause it seems he has no plan to marry or have kids in near future cause he does not want to loose his independence and the free time he has to do the things he wants to do with no responsability to get in the way.

    • maybe he'll like it? just guessin

What Girls Said 1

  • you should tell him.

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    • I should tell him that next time is on me?

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