Can somebody give me advice that doesn't involve therapy?

Seriously, I'm already in therapy and it hasn't done me any good, so, any other advice? Basically, I think I may be a danger to myself. I started thinking this yesterday when I was actually begging imaginary people to kill me. Before this gets reported, no, this isn't a suicide post, that's not how I intend it, I'm just seeking advice. I also realized, last night, that I get deeply depressed whenever I become attracted to a girl, because I'm constantly consumed with thoughts of rejection, self doubt, and self hatred. These thoughts fuel my self-hatred because they're the reason I never act on my feelings, making me miss my chance, making me even more miserable. This in turn feeds my self-hatred which feeds my thoughts of being rejected to the point that they get overwhelming, like last night when I was prepared to harm myself to win an argument... I was having with myself. As I said, this isn't a suicide question, so please don't report this, i just want to know what I can do.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you fear rejection too much you will be stuck. Rejection is part of life, like a failed experiment - practice leads to perfection. Eventually, you will succeed.

    You must realize that we ALL do commit mistakes, we will fail and be reject several and several times in life. This is precious learning. There is no way to guarantee success in anything, and no flawless human being.

    As some say, the "NO" we already have, so if we receive a nice and sounding "NO" from anyone or anything, we are just the same, nothing more happened, so we do not really have anything to lose, only to win if we get the "YES".

    There is some "exercise" about dating you could try. Try dating unattractive (for you) girls. If they give you a "no", you will not be much harmed at all. If they give you "yes"s, you may learn two things: 1 - it was not that hard to take some no's in order to have a yes; 2 - you will be surprised about how nice and attractive some people really are after we know them more. Just be careful to respect their feelings and do not toy with their hearts - it hurts and you know it.

    In time, you will be more confident and see life through other eyes.

    Good luck :)

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What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think you can manage overcoming your problem on your own, otherwise you would have done it already. How long are you in therapy? If you're in therapy for a pretty long time, you probably should see another professional.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I use to struggle having emotions of hatred and resentment. The best cure is forgiving. In your case, forgive yourself. It's sound ludicrous, but it works because it creates inner-peace for yourself. It may take years to overcome your negative emotions. I suggest doing something constructive and positive for yourself as a means to better yourself, while you're working on forgiving yourself. You will feel much happier with yourself having develop new skills and success with your life. I can guarantee this. For me, it was going to college and pursuing my dream which challenged me and made happier with myself. For you, I don't know. It could me the same thing or something totally different. Only you know what will make you happier and stronger. Keep in mind that people who go through dark moments in life come out stronger than most people. Just be optimistic, you already made the first step by acknowledging your problem. Knowing is the half the battle. Best of luck!

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    • Thanks, I've been suicidal in the past and have spent awhile convincing myself I was no longer depressed. However, a day long freakout that nearly ended in me stabbing myself to prove an insane point forced me to accept otherwise.

    • Of course. Glad I could offer some help. :)

  • break the cycle my only advice

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  • Counselling.

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