Do you think its wrong to date a man with a child, if you have no intention of being a part of that child's life?

Women, would you do it? This has happened a few times with my friends and now it's happening to me. Someone likes a guy who has a kid, and you're scared that he wants you to be a part of that childs life, and you question how far the relationship could go.

Men with children, wouldn't you eventually expect her to be involved with your child?

This is one of many reasons why I avoid dating older men. However, it happened, he's 35, and he has a daughter. She's a little girl. He hasn't said anything yet, but we've been involved for a while. I can feel things getting a bit more serious and I'm thinking of cutting this off before any damage can be done and before I get too invested in this. I just turned 25, and I'm just really not the person who needs or wants to be playing mommy to someone else's little kids. He hasn't even said anything yet, but it's a looming fear. "I'd you to meet my daughter" are the words of my nightmares. Can not handle. I'm not mature enough for this shit.

Anyway, do you think it's wrong to continue with things, only to eventually tell him that I want no part in his daughters and I'd rather not spend any time with her? I can't imagine him accepting that if we did reach that point.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • well if it turns into anything serious then yeah its not right to want him and not his child because there is no way the guy is gonna put you before his daughter.

    if both came to a mutual agreement its just dating for fun then no problem. the daughter doesn't need to be involved at all. only when it takes a turn for the serious.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I think it's not giving the child it's due care.
    (Or importance.) You're both part of her dad's life tus it would be gross to ignore her.

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  • I think that is a step too far - The guy has to put his child first.

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  • Yes, absolutely.

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  • If you're looking for something serious, and have no intentions of being a part of her life... You are worthless trash! :)

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    • How am I worthless trash for not wanting to be involved with someone else's child? She's not my daughter.

    • Show All
    • Thats fine, but I don't get how that makes me "worthless trash" lol But okay...

    • Is soulless harlot better?

What Girls Said 5

  • I mean, his child is his life. You're just an add-on, no offense. So if you don't see yourself ever wanting to meet her then you need to cut ties because you've already sealed the fate of your relationship being a dead end one. What's the point in continuing being with this dude if he's so very clearly not your end game?

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  • Yes, typically, he would dangling the idea of you being a future mother to his daughter. I feel you tho cause I am 25 and I do want to have kids oneday but I am just not ready as yet and that going to be something that the two of you discuss, You really have to tell him now before its gets more serious than to drop it like a bomb at the last minute and break his heart.

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    • Yeah I also don't want to raise someone else's kids, to be honest. I think its best to cut it off now before it gets any deeper

    • I think you need to end it. Maybe go for guys with no kids but next time you date someone, ask them early up if they have kids. All the best !

  • You should have broken it off a log time ago and not wasted his time. Eventually you will have to meet, it would be inevitable. And if you decide to get married you'll have to be a step mom. Just break it off and don't waste more of his time

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  • Yes it is wrong. It's a packaged deal

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  • It's not wrong you're entitled to your choices and who'd want to deal with someone else's brat from some hoe anyway. Just tell him the deal and if he doesn't like it find a better man you're worth more than second best.

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