I screwed up, how do I make things right?

I've been dating a great guy for going on two months now. We have fun together, he's caring, listens to me when I tell him he has made a mistake and I am so comfortable with being myself. My hair is let all the way down. However, friction has started because I've become more demanding of his personal time, and upset when he can't give it to me when I want it. I've frustrated myself with entitled feelings that he owes me all of his time, already. Unfortunately, this sound logic has not been applied and this Friday , after quite a few happy hour cocktails, boiled over into my emotions. Needless to say, I lashed out because I wanted to see him that night and he already had plans. He tried to reason with me but I wasn't having it. Ultimately, I sent him a text at 11PM that night stating I don't see us going anywhere, I don't feel we're building anything of substance and this is not what I'm looking for. He did not respond. He never just goes silent. So, further into my emotional stupor that had turned into panic, and having friends in my ear all night, I sent him another, backpeddling text saying I want to do what he says and start over, so we can keep moving forward but only if we can find a common ground. Again, silence. I was so down & out... We haven't spoken all weekend, and that's prob best so the both of us could take space. I messed up, big time, and I need to sincerely apologize. I would also like some honest feedback. Damage control help, please and thank you :) !


Most Helpful Guy

  • First, figure out why you acted this way to begin with. The problem started with your actions and will end the same way. what made you so posesive? Then after you both have cooled down apologize to him. admit you were being selfish and explain why this occured. Ask if he will give you another chance, after all you made a mistake, as long as you learned from it ( Obviously be sincere) The fact is this behaviour is a red flag, two months in is not a lot of time and having a life outside of each other is a very important thing for a healthy relationship. In short Apologize, be sincere, let him no it won't happen again.

    • It is a HUGE red flag and it sucks because it's not who I am. It was a mistake. Think I have deeper feelings already than I'm willing to accept/admit. So naturally, I was a raging nut job. Super embarrassing. I am going to try my best to rectify this mishap. He's worth it. And I'm worth it :)

    • Tell him exactly that, its genuine and honest. I don't know how he will respond but if he responds positively then it will be because you were genuinte and honest. Good luck.

    • The feeling of rejection is the reactor.


Have an opinion?


Send It!

What Guys Said 2

  • All you can do is apologize and then hope for a shred of forgiveness so you can begin earning his trust back. You said some pretty hurtful and damning things about the relationship and it will take time to get over it. Be prepared that this will come up in future arguments too. You did good recognizing your problem instead of having to have him point it out. It makes things easier when he is ready to talk.

    • Thank you. I plan to apologize tomorrow, and hope for the best. He didn't deserve that, at all.

  • Now that you've realised that a relationship needs to be perfectly balanced and that he cannot give you all of his time,
    just talk to him once about this and confess what you felt (that night) and everything you wanna say to him, why you sent him that text
    you also gotta make him believe that you are sorry and you've now realised your mistake :)


What Girls Said 2

  • Are you positive he had his phone on him? Maybe he just lost his phone? If not, then the best is give him space, even if it's agony waitig for a responce. Wish you the best of luck (:

  • You wanted to manipulate him into making things go your way. He figured it out so he probably decided that you are not worthy of his time and affection, since were trying to control him so he ignored your text.
    When you saw that he didn't take the bait you backpaddled and you tried to compromise.
    Anyway, if you truly want him start by apologizing and by telling him that you will stop being so demanding.

    • Agreed. Thank you!

    • You're welcome. : )
      Good luck and I hope you change for the best.