Is being good or bad at kissing a one dimensional thing, or do you think there's kissing compatibility?

So I've found someone to be quite awful kissers despite them being quite experienced, which led me to wonder if perhaps that the way some guys like them to kiss.

Do you think there are various ways to be good at kissing, and that someone may be incompatible in terms of how they kiss, or do you think it's just a simple single with good at one end and terrible at the other?

  • All good kissers would be considered good by most people.
    10% (10)20% (11)14% (21)Vote
  • There are different styles of kissing which can lead to an incompatibility between different good kissers.
    62% (62)36% (20)53% (82)Vote
  • I haven't kissed (m) any people
    11% (11)13% (7)12% (18)Vote
  • I haven't got a clue
    6% (6)16% (9)10% (15)Vote
  • See answers
    11% (11)15% (8)11% (19)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
Anyone... This isn't that complicated a question surely... Anyone have an opinion?
Does anyone have an opinion?

0|0
27|9

Most Helpful Girl

  • People have different preferences when it comes to kissing.

    For example, I don't enjoy a lot of tongue during kissing (like, I prefer more "playful teasing" than "tongue wrestling"). But some people DO like a lot of tongue. So, if I kissed someone who used a lot of tongue, I wouldn't enjoy it as much as someone who does enjoy a lot of tongue.

    I'd say that the best kissers are a) people who like kissing the same way you do, or b) "adaptable kissers" - people who pay attention to the way their partner is trying to kiss them and follow their lead (of course, the downside for those people is that they may end up kissing their partner in a way that they themselves do not enjoy).

    5|1
    0|0

What Girls Said 26

  • A. Of course, there are people who have preferred types of kissing so they might be bad at the other types.

    For instance, it seems like a lot of people here DON'T like tongue-kissing and I love it. So if I were to only deal with a guy who wanted pecks on the lips, that would get boring and last less than a minute. And if he isn't a tongue kisser, he might be very sloppy.

    He's not BAD. He just hasn't had any practice/doesn't enjoy it. But typically I think every good kisser is considered good by most people. I haven't ever been told I was a bad kisser. When I gave my first hickey, the guy said I was amazing.

    1|1
    0|0
    • I don't get how people aren't into tongue kissing, it's the best part... I have heard girls complain about guys using too much tongue though, I've never heard a guy complain about it.

  • I've never thought it was a one-dimensional sort of thing. I love kissing. You can never have too much, but especially the times where we don't kiss through the entire foreplay then he kisses me as soon as he goes inside me during sex, or if he comes in for a kiss right as he gets me to cum... definitely more than one-dimensional.

    In terms of kissing compatibility, yes within reason. With past guys including my current one, even with kissing there's a bit of a learning curve. You each learn what the other likes/doesn't like, who takes more control while kissing then synchronize your moves around that.

    0|0
    0|0
    • By one dimensional I meant would everyone fall on a single for how good they are, if there are different types of good so there would be multiple scales, so a multidimensional thing.

      So when an experienced woman seems like a terrible kisser, she probably just is terrible?

    • Show All
    • I didn't mean inexperienced implies that they're bad, I just would have thought that someone experienced would be reasonably good at least.

    • someone being a good kisser is subjective though. What works for one person, will be a turn-off for the other.

  • I voted B, and I wanted to say that sex has a style too. Think about how culture and religion play into what positions are "legal". Some girls prefer doggy, but maybe he thinks it's degrading or dehumanizing and not do it for those reasons. Many women prefer girl on top, simply for the deeper penetration, but maybe he finds this demasculating. Many religions only allow missionary.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Which religion allows only missionary? O_O
      I never knew that.

    • Show All
    • I get notifications for replies to my opinions, and to my comments. Unless the site has changed things... again. I've been here since 2010, and they've changed more in the last 6 months than the past 5 years combined.

    • Ooohhh, you learn something new everyday! Thanks! Lol

  • Of course different kissing styles won't be LOVED by all, but they would ad least be accepted by all - and not criticized in a bad way.
    A bad kissing style - will be criticized by all... no matter what style it is.

    People with the same style are the most compatible, but a good kisser would be recognized as such by all.

    So A mostly and then B.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've wondered about individual kissing compatibility myself! There should be scientific research done ASAP if there hasn't been already lol.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've only been kissed by 3 guys. Two were bad, one was somewhat enjoyable. I know he's been with 5 other women (sexually at least), but I don't know about the other two. I'm sure that if a person kisses many people for long enough periods of time, they can learn different kissing styles, so I'm guessing that the more someone kisses, the better they'd be. I could be wrong, though.

    0|0
    0|0
    • "... so I'm guessing that the more someone kisses, the better they'd be." That's what I would have expected too, but I kissed a woman the other day, who was quite experienced and yet she was pretty terrible at it. WHich is why I thought perhaps they way she kisses is what some guys like.

    • Yeah. I really think it can go either way. It's a weird topic to think about.

  • This is just my opinion on the matter of bad kissing. If you can't kiss you can't fuck

    1|0
    0|0
    • You think bad kissers are bad at sex? (Or is it that just requirement you have?)

    • Show All
    • Okay, thanks for answering.

    • You're so welcome. Enjoy your kissing adventures😊

  • This is going to sound so stupid but when I was younger like 13 I asked my mom how to kiss or how do I know if I'm doing it right. NO she didn't show me lmao or let me practice on her for you sickos! She simply told me to mimic what the other person does and follow the flow and it will work every time so kissing will be fun with everyone. I have kissed some guys and it seemed like they were just in there own world. They either had lizard tongue, or they would put their tongue down my throat, or they kissed like a fish which obviously the tip didn't work out. But like 90% of the time it's completely worked and I have enjoyed kissing all of my boyfriends

    0|0
    0|0
  • I really can't say. I didn't really like any of the guys I dated until I found my current boyfriend, but at least one of the four before him kissed really well (despite being the least attractive one). My current boyfriend kisses so well that I learned a few tricks from him, but I'm not sure how much of his kissing skill comes from my attraction to him and how much is from his actual talent.

    0|0
    0|0
  • i think there secret to being a good kisser is empathy compassion respect being attracted to your partner LOVING to kiss and rhythm.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've been kissed twice. I love kissing one (current boyfriend ) and the other was a one time deal that was awful it was like he was trying to engulf my mouth. Yuck. I think kissing depends on the person because I know I like lip biting and less wet kisses where as some may love lots of tongue action. Two people need to be compatible to be good kissers for each other

    0|0
    0|0
  • There are different styles of kissing. You kiss generally the way you like to be kissed so it's better to find someone who is compatible with that.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I don't know! My first kiss was with a complete stranger!

    0|0
    0|0
    • So was mine... It was more new/interesting/weird than good or bad.

    • Yeah I didn't french kiss or anything. In fact from a far point of view I look desperate for love! When I think about I just laugh it off. Kissing or sex does not as valuable as who you are as a person.

  • Even if a guy is experienced and a bad kisser, I'm pretty sure you could still teach them how you like to be kissed or what you prefer. If you're just persistent with your kissing style, he may pick up on it and might change to match you. More experience does make anyone better at anything so I guess practice makes perfect

    0|0
    0|0
    • Perhaps, though you'd think someone experienced would have picked up on that already.

    • Some people have had experience with bad kisses and pick up on that or they have experience on a kissing style that you may not like. Everyone is always learning so it doesn't hurt to try and teach

  • I think the only one-dimensional rule with kissing is that you need to pay attention to your partner & not just do things your way.

    2|0
    0|0
  • It depends , which is why it is important to mimic your partners moves a bit and to just go with the flow. I never kiss two people the same

    0|0
    0|0
  • I voted B. I've only ever kissed my boyfriend but I do know that some kisses are better or worse than others. They can be different, even with the same person.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Indeed, and I suppose some people may prefer different things in a kiss.

  • i like being kissed a certain way, so i believe in kissing compaibility. other women may or may not enjoy being kissed the same way i do although some guys are so terrible kissers that i don't know if there will be some women who like the way they kiss

    0|0
    0|0
  • it is not usually a physical thing unless he is a "chewer" or a "slobberer". It is a man that dissolves his essence into yours and time loses contact with you for a moment and it is wonderful.

    0|0
    0|0
  • no there are just bad kissers and good kissers. one guy bit me and my lip bleed. bad kisser. some people just dont know what the hell they are doing

    0|0
    0|0
    • I know some are definitely bad, but I've been wondering if some who seem bad to me would be considered good by other guys. (Girls who I've kissed and thought were pretty bad at it have been fairly experienced which is why it seems odd that they're just terrible.)

  • Vote B

    Most men I date are good kissers but a GREAT-compatible-kisser can ignite sparks all through my body and THAT feeling is xtremely rare.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's a bit of both vote a and b...

    Generally a good kisser would be considered good by most people but there are different styles of kissing which can lead to an incompatibility between different good kissers...

    0|0
    0|0
  • I chose b but can you answer something for me... Does lip biting from the guy mean that he's enjoying the kissing?

    0|0
    0|0
    • That is a pretty good clue, yes, but it could also be simply because he has inferred from experience or observation that women respond well to it. Either way, it definitely hints that he desires you.

  • There are different styles of kissing which can lead to an incompatibility between different good kissers.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Everyone kisses differently, but once you get a partner, you both get on like the same rithm and it's as if one "teaches" the other to get better? If you know what I'm saying..

    0|0
    0|0
    • Yeah I know what you mean, both of you sort of adapt the way you kiss to be more like the other person. Some people do seem terrible though, despite being experienced, which is why I asked this.

    • Show All
    • Anyway, thanks for answering.

    • No problem (:

  • This is a really good question! I picked A because most women have similar complaints about a bad kissing experience which suggests that they all like similar things and therefore a good kisser would be good to most women. Common complaints are too much saliva, too soon with tongue, too forceful with tongue, too vigorous. I would guess there is still variation in what people like - some may like it more soft/sensual than others.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I thought it was an interesting question, I'd hoped to get more answers...

      I guess things I've found I don't like are when she keeps her lips rigid (not sure how to explain exactly what I mean, but I like our lips to be able to slide/move over each others, which they can't when hers are puffed out and still.) and also if she's just going at a pace where I can't synchronise with her at all.

    • Show All
    • I guess we could ask but whether we get an honest answer is another matter. I dont recall anyone ever telling me I was good or bad. If I was bad I'd want to improve.

    • No I wouldn't be sure of an honest to a question like that.

What Guys Said 9

  • being a good kisser is something a person can be on their own; however there is also kissing compatibility that plays into two people being good at kissing each other.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's like dancing... But with the tongue.

    Some people have a natural rhythm that allows them to go with the flow. They feel it out and know when and how to do things without thinking about it. Other people need to learn a particular style. And then with the styles comes the compatibility issue. Like mosh pit fight dancing wouldn't mix with salsa dancing. And then there's the unlucky few have two left feet and flounder regardless of practice or partner. It's all in their rhythm.

    So I'm going to say that from a personal stand point, a good "natural rhythm" kisser is going to be relatively 'good' across the board. They may not hit the compatibility level of two people that have the same style- but they can stick in tune and have fun doing it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • There are definitely different ways to kiss. I went out with a woman that was a horrible kisser. If your together long term, and willing to work on it, you can certainly learn to kiss in a way both people are ok with

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's a one dimensional thing. Kissing is a skill that can be taught, and perfected, through experience. :)

    0|0
    0|0
  • guess there r good n bad kissers generally :)

    0|0
    0|0
  • Someone could be the greatest kisser in the world but if there's no mutual attraction the kissing won't be good. OTOH if you really like someone and the first kiss isn't so hot, you can both laugh about it and it will get better.

    0|0
    0|0
  • You just have to read the other person. Like for example if you are giving tongue but they aren't giving back, stop they aren't feeling it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • People have different ideas of how kissing should be. It can get a bit awkward at time.. s

    0|0
    0|0
  • I don't know I haven't kissed yet

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...