Ohh my I guess I will have to treat him for a meal?

that cost around $60. Darn!! There is a guy I like and on the firt date he paid for both of us. We went to Applebees as he does not like junk or fast food, so we went there. Not that I like Mac or any other fast food restaurant but he is not into that unhealthy joints and i. well I dont eat at those places as well. He took me to Applebees and he piad for both of us and the price tag was $60 for both. There will be a second date eventually next month and this time it is my treat and I have to invite him for movies and idinner, and now that Im thinking about the price I think I will have to treat him to a place similar like Applebees, not lower than that cause it be disrespectful from my part since he paid for both of us the first time. I mean I do work and all but I have never invited a guy before in my life. The sad part is that when we were talking about the second date I suggested him that we could go out for his bday in that case I will have to treat him for movies and meals right?

He even mentioned me that and said: "Ohh if the outing is for my bday then you will have to invite me 100%" because before I mentioned him the bday issue he told me that for second date each pay our own movie ticket and dinner is my treat unless I want to pay for all he quoted . But after that the bday subject was brought by me and it be rude from my part if I told him like. "Well lets go other time when it is not your bday so each one can pay the movie but I will invite you for dinner." that be very disrespectulf and he won't like to hang out with me anymore cause I m not a woman of word..

O well I think this time I will have to spend money for the both of us movie and dinner when we go out for the second date unless we come with some sort of arrangement that movie each and dinner on me even if it is for his bday but I doubt it will happen, he told me that if it is for his bday I will have to pay 1'00%


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Not sure you even asked the question, by the end of that you pretty much came to the conclusion yourself lol. Anyway I would just pay for the next time you go out, for his birthday and then from then on, just pay for yourselves individually in every situation, that's what I always did on dates, to me it helps avoid confusing and a "was this fair" battle.

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    • So for the second date I should pay? I mean the second date has not taken place at all and the guy invited me on the first date. Unfortunately this guy bday is next week and last week we were talking about going out again but movies this time, he mentioned first this: Each one pay its own movie ticket but then you will invite for dinner and then he added like a joking manner "unless you want to invite me for all (this all meant movies and dinner)" but my mistake perhaps was suggesting him afterwards that we can go out on his bday to celebrate it in which case he responded: " Ahh if we will go out on my bday then you have to invite me to all" (all meant movie and dinner).
      I dont know but where I live it is not unusual that the bday person does not pay, beause he or she is the guest of honor so the rest of the people attending the gathering pay the bday person as an lets say appreciation. But in this person it is just the guy and me.

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    • maybe he said thatin a way that sounded arrogant because he knows it was only fair i will invite him since he paid me for the first date? Could it be he just wanted to make sure?

    • Maybe so, it's up to you to judge how he meant it, I wasn't there and if you feel like he didn't mean it in a rude way then don't worry about it.

What Guys Said 2

  • The saddest part is women want equality and then I read sh$% like this. YOU SHOULD HAVE PAID LONG AGO. You are by definition cheap because you want to keep the money you earn and take his money. It is only now that you are paying. You are a pathetic stain on the movement for social equality. Feminism is for social equality as well.

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    • I mean the second date has not taken place at all and the guy invited me on the first date. Unfortunately this guy bday is next week and last week we were talking about going out again but movies this time, he mentioned first this: Each one pay its own movie ticket but then you will invite for dinner and then he added like a joking manner "unless you want to invite me for all (this all meant movies and dinner)" but my mistake perhaps was suggesting him afterwards that we can go out on his bday to celebrate it in which case he responded: " Ahh if we will go out on my bday then you have to invite me to all" (all meant movie and dinner).
      I dont know but where I live it is not unusual that the bday person does not pay, beause he or she is the guest of honor so the rest of the people attending the gathering pay the bday person as an lets say appreciation. But in this person it is just the guy and me.

      Im not thinking in taking his money you misunderstood. First date: guy pays...

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    • I forgot to add this @GirlsLie

    • She should but I think her question was confusing and I think she was confused about a 2nd date and going out for his birthday and which she should pay for or if both.

  • Aw sounds good treat him.

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    • Thanjks for you rassurement other people are saying already he sound like a jerk and that I should not invite him at all because women does not feel obligated to pay or better yet each party has to pay for our own whether it is first second or third date. I mean really women can't invite a guy in thees days? Or really have you seen women paying for the men?

    • I didn't read your whole description. I think it just sounds sweet for a woman to treat a man out once in a while.

What Girls Said 3

  • What if you suggest a picnic and then catch the weekend matinee? You can grab something like a rotisserie chicken and make some nice sides or you can go out for lunch instead of dinner. If you go to a restaurant that gives bday discounts you can save even more.

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  • I understand paying on his bday, but it is only your second date, so you don't have to go crazy. And I don't understand why you "have to pay" for both. I mean it's nice to offer, but the decent thing is to split it if money is an issue.

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    • What is the meaing of invite? If someone tells you I invite you to dinner what does it mean? That person pays you and obviously it has to pay for imself as well, unless the person goes on hunger strike and wotn eat anything just because he is trating you and not him so he wotn eat at all and I dont think that will happen

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    • that phrase let me know he wanted another date but the second one It was going to be on me, because he paid for the first one. I thought it was only fair and I never told him or mentioned him I was not going to do it. when he told me the phrase Next time you invite you pay. Then we were texting about the second date and I told him we could go to the movies this time because last time we could not go and he said sure, another hang out sounds good. And then he added: " Each one pay the movie ticket but you invite dinner" then he continue saying like in a teasing way "unless you want to pay for all". I never answered that. As the dialogueu continue it ocurred to me mentioning that we could go out for his bday, like to celebrate it, siince it is this month so then he said: "Ahh if we are going out for my birthday then you will have to invite me 100%" This is the reason i said in this particular case that I will h ave to iinvite him for all if it is for hi bday and then also I said..

    • I also said that since he invited me the first date the second date it be only fair if it goes on me. If we have a thrird date things will be different as I assumethat time each one pay for our own food. The excpetion are these 2 first dates. It was me who brought the idea of hanging out for his bday he only responded that if itis to celebrate his bday then I will have to inite him 100%. But as i see it this guy is modern and he prefers of course each one pay for our own but these 2 first dates turn out different since he invite me for the first one so the second one it goes on me only fair. in that case, the following dates will be different I guessif there will be other dates. Also in the first date I did the effort to go to where he lives and I dont even have a car this second time he told me (and I did not even bring up the subject) he will commute to my town for the get together, he behaves like a modern guy because he is independent and lives by himself.

  • Why do you have to pay?
    I don't know where you're from, but where I'm from a good guy would never consider letting a girl pay or split the bill
    He sounds like a jerk

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    • a guy is a jerk for splitting the bill? we're in the 21st century.

    • Thanks Toad for ur support. I was going to say something similar why a guy isa jerk just because split the bill. I guess you the one answering that let men pay all your dates that is taking advantage of him and that is wrong wrong,.

    • Guys I've been out with, I've always offered to pay and meant it but they don't give me the change to and would never let me pay for them.
      If you like splitting the bill that's fine, I just like a gentleman
      The part which makes him a jerk is him outright telling you that you have to pay for him.
      You offering to pay is a nice thing, him telling you that you have to pay is a dick move
      But that's my opinion, if you like that kind of thing than go for it

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