So basically I realize how irrational I'm being but I get really anxcious and tend to get really worked up (Heavy breathing, heart beats faster, mind goes on overdrive) when I know my boyfriend has been talking to his friends that are girls. The thing is, it's all innocent coversation. It can be talking about cats, to sending silly face pictures, but it still makes me incredibly jealous cause it feels like I'm "sharing" him per say, I know it's just a friendship but it feels like even if it's innocent things, that he's bonding with them in some way.
They're only online friends which I think is the part that bothers me because we blossemed our relationship online for 4 years long distance before we actually moved and started living together. Now that we live together we don't text/online chat as much as we used to (obv cause we see eachother everyday, go out, do things, talk in person, cuddle, etc)
My insecurities/jealousy have become over wheming to me now and I don't even know how to stop my mind from overthinking a situation and then I just get irritated with him even though he's done nothing wrong. I don't want to stop him from having female friends, I just don't understand why he just can't have guy friends only... Pleaseee if anyone has any advice/tips for me on dealing with my jealousy situation I would love to hear it! =[ I don't want these insecurities of mine to ruin our otherwise perfect relationship.
Ps. I've talked with him about it so much to the point where he would stop talking to them if I wanted him too, just so I don't bring it up again. I just don't want to be controlling but I can't help the way i feel =[
- Of course he can have female friends, this is normal50% (4)67% (6)59% (10)Vote
- He doesn't need female friends..25% (2)22% (2)24% (4)Vote
- Yup, You're over thinking it25% (2)11% (1)17% (3)Vote
Most Helpful Girl
Okay, so you are quite aware that it is irrational to be super jealous over girls that your boyfriend talks to. But at the same time, you would prefer him to have all-male friends so that you didn't have to feel that way. I am glad you were able to admit that you have some troubles with your insecurities. Now you just have to deal with them. It's hard, especially if the female friends are online, and I can see how you would be jealous because that's how you met him, and you're afraid that perhaps he could potentially be developing another relationship right before your eyes. If you truly believe that the conversations he has with his female friends are innocent and purely platonic, then there is no need for you to feel jealous. In the end, he is yours. In the end, he logs off the computer/laptop/phone/whatever and goes to bed with you. In the end, he talks with you IN PERSON, CUDDLES, and more. Think about what you have with him and take pride that no other girl will be able to have that with him but you. ONLY you. You need to let him be friends with whomever he wants. You say you don't want to be controlling--then DON'T BE. CALM DOWN and think rationally! You trust him, right? Then let him be! You don't want to ruin the relationship, and by controlling who he can talk to, that will make him feel caged and trapped, suffocating because he won't be able to do whatever he wants with his FRIENDS, male OR female. He may one day leave you because of it.1