Race and stereotypes in dating?

so if you were going to date outside of your race:
how would you go about finding out what racial stereotypes are actually true for your dating partner without sounding like an ignorant racist douchebag?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Normally I just joke about it. I mean stereotypes are funny if you have a good sense of humor.
    I'm brown and my boyfriend is white. We joke around about stuff.
    The thing is that stereotypes are so generalized and dumb. Anyone could be lazy or smart or sexy... It really has nothing to do with the color of your skin. But it's funny to see that there are still ass holes that think that things like that have to do with a persons skin color.

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    • yeah being able to joke about it is important to me... but what for example if you are black and actually really liked chicken or melon or grapes or whatever stupid stereotype there is.

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    • it´s not :D that were some of the examples i thought were funny.

What Girls Said 7

  • I wouldn't ask someone about racial stereotypes to begin with. There's no need to know what's true and what isn't. You'll naturally get to know the person eventually for who they are.

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    • What she said

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    • Stereotypes are hardly ever interesting in my opinion.

    • ok just an examples of what i mean: i am german and really like beer and sauerkraut xD this is the kind of stereotypes that i´d find funny and would want to know about.

  • Ask her friends lol

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    • lol that´s pretty far into the dating process though.

    • Well, usually you find your dates in a social setting.. with their friends xD Ask them while she went to the bathroom lol

  • Or you could date them open mindedly and understand that stereotypes are commonly dumb overly exaggerated generalizations, and actually try to learn about their personality

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    • i know that about stereotypes xD but i still want to know... because there are quite some stereotypes considering me that i totally agree with :D

    • But you can't let one person determine whether a stereotype is true or accurate.

    • no it´s not about verifying the stereotypes xD just about if by coincidence, they are true for her.

  • ? I wouldn't worry about it. While stereotypes have some validity on a Macro scale, they mean little on a personal scale. For example, Austrian guys are inflexible and regimented. That doesn't mean that the one you date will be.

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  • Well mixed race so dating within my race is pretty hard. I would assume people know racial stereotypes are not true unless they live under a rock.

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    • well some are true though XD for example i am german white and i like beer and potatoes, which is totally stereotypical.

  • If you have that mentality where you feel the need to look for racial stereotypes then you should stick with your race. Don't subject your ignorance onto innocent people

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  • I know everyone isn't the same so don't assume the stereotypes are true for the guy I am dating. I have dated from four races total, and the stereotypes surrounding their race generally didn't apply to them really.

    If you are comfortable with your girlfriend/boyfriend after dating for a bit, then you can maybe bring it up and ask what the heck is that all about? One guy joked about a minor stereotype but he had a good point. Fried chicken is indeed delicious and I really liked how he prepared his. :D

    Another guy did joke about being able to tolerate the heat and sun because of his background. They seem to joke about it, so that means they're comfortable with me and I'm glad.

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    • yeah that´s what i´m talking about :D so if they were joking, it wouldn´t be a problem for you?

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    • yeah distance kills most romances/friendships... sad

    • Yeah... he met someone else that lived near him. At least he's happy :)

What Guys Said 4

  • I usually push the stereotypes out of my mind and take the person as they are. Just talk, listen and learn. Take my ex for example. As we hungout more I slowly learned she is not great at math. Although her sister is pretty good at math. She was a better driver than I was.

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  • I would find out myself. I would get to know her and if she has too many things I don't like I won't date her. But I do this with every girl, no matter what race.

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    • it´s not about things i like or not. of course i will learn it some day anyway.

  • I can just tell by looking sometimes

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    • so what stereotypes do you see if you look at me? :D

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    • lol i heard the "you look smart" thing a few times now XD i wonder why. i don´t think i look smart at all :D

    • I think it's because I know you're German and I just think they're smart haha

  • How to find out if a racial stereotype about their race is true? You ask. If it makes you a douchebag so what? You wanted to know didn't you?

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    • well you obviously being a dochebag doesn´t exactly help while dating XD

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    • i don´t consider myself to be a douchebag :D though i guess some don´t have a humor for it and would feel offended if you talked about stuff like this.

    • Hahaha true.

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