Should I go on a second date with a guy who didn't pay on the first date?

I met a guy from an online dating website yesterday for coffee. Prior to that, we had been texting for about a week but didn't talk on the phone. He got there a few mins early and already ordered his coffee. When I got there, I greeted him and went to the line to get my coffee. He followed me and stood besides me as I paid for my coffee. He didn't offer at all and he was the person who asked me to meet up. What do you make of this? Should it be a concern or should I go on a second date with him? I thought it was non-chivalrous of him to not even offer to pay on a first date. Other than that, he seemed fine and we talked for about 3 hours.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You shouldn't go on a second date - for his sake. That you're willing to throw all this away before it even gets started, because he wouldn't buy a few dollars worth of coffee for you, suggests you're not really ready for an adult relationship.

    There will be far tougher tests and decisions and situations ahead in your love life.

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What Guys Said 5

  • It depends on how important him paying is to you. Coffee is cheap, he might spring for the check after a meal but think nothing of you paying for a coffee.

    At this stage I'd focus more on whether you enjoy spending time with him and whether there's any chemistry, then worry about smaller details like this if you continue seeing each other.

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  • Coffee no big deal, if u had went together in same car he woulda been a gentlmen and got it and paid for it, having said that it was coffee, no big deal. But if he asks u to dinner he should pay according to the way i was brought up

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  • I bet if he payed for everything of yours you wouldn't be complaining...

    #DoubleStandards.

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  • if u r interested in him then
    I prefer u to go on second date with him so that u can get chance to know him more

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  • Omg you paid for what you drank? Holy shit that's what I have to do regardless of who asked out who. What is this world coming to? Next you'll be equal and that's not what you want. You want to be treated like your helpless to by yourself the coffee you drink. This will prove that he will buy you shit and and that will validate everything else about him which you find fine. Without him paying, everything else about him is worthless.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Because he doesn't know you yet... give it another shot and see what happens this time round

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  • I dont see whats wrong in there. He came first and he ordered his coffee. You came later on and you're buying your own. If you both ordered together, then yes he should be the one paying.

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  • If you're not into guys who aren't traditional, maybe you shouldn't.

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  • It was rude that he ordered his own coffee before you arrived then to just let you walk over to order your own! He should've waited for you to arrive before ordering his, then ordered both your coffees and paid for both of them. I wouldn't see him again if I were you.

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