Is 19 and 33 too big of an age gap in a relationship?

He's 33 and Im 19. He's not a creep or anything. He has a job and usually does date women that are in the same range.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • In the case of the actual number of years I don't think there is a problem, the problem is where you both are in your life. At 19 you may well think you know it all and what you want out of life , but I can tell you I thought the same thing when I went to college, dated more seriously, and really thought about my future I found out that I still had a lot to learn and honestly that doesn't ever really stop. The point I'm trying to make is that at 33 he has learned a lot more about life than you have and I believe that is going to cause problems between you.

    That being said I don't think its impossible for you guys to have a relationship, but you both will have to be very patient with each other and care about each other a great deal to have a lasting relationship. I wish you guys luck if you are already in one.

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What Guys Said 14

  • No age is just a number, you can't help who you fall in love with.

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  • Depends, the real question is:
    Are you ready to get married and start a family already? If not there's going to be trouble.

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  • I wouldn't date someone that much older than me but you're both adults so your opinions are the only ones that matter

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  • i would say yes too big of a gap, don't do it, you never know what you can "be". I say no don't date him

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  • Yes. A teenager and a thirtysomething have very little in common lifewise.

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  • If you guys are into each other go with it. It's too big of a gap when YOU think he's a creep.

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  • NO (filler)

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  • You're both adults and age is just a number.

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  • Yes it is indeed

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  • You're fine.

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  • It is a big gap that is 14 years. However, if you do like him that is up to you to decide.

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  • Well of course most peoples immediate reaction would be that he's a cradle snatcher and only after one thing blah blah blah. But every relationship and person is different. People put people in category's and are very quick to judge.
    If he treats you with respect and you both click and have enough in common then I don't see a problem with this. You're both adults.

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  • Having a job is irrelevant.

    Highest concern I suppose would be life goals and motivations of each person at this point in their lives. One doesn't think and want the same at 19 vs 33.

    Compatibility is the main issue for relationships with large age gaps failing.

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    • It's given she will change when growing from 33 to 43 as well. Then that will happen if she makes it to 53. It's not like everyone has uniform personality's, goals and motivations that need to align based on age from 19 to 33.

    • @cavmanier Nobody's saying everyone has uniform personalities through those ages. Point is that the difference of thoughts/wants causes conflict of interests, especially for someone barely considered a legal "adult" compared to a more matured individual. By the time people are 30+, they can date even 20+ years older and it wouldn't be that big of a deal.

  • nope. not if he doesn't get bored.

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What Girls Said 9

  • its too much. you're only young once you should go through all the stages with people you're own age. you won't notice now but you'll regret it later. and he should date people that have already loved their youth. he's blocking your development.

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    • He's older and has more life lessons and experiences. He can teach her and help her to learn new things. Everything doesn't have to be negative.

    • thats the point. learning is more than being 'taught' things. you have to go through life. not just being given a prejudiced cheat sheet. she already had a father/ mother for 20 years. she needs to go through life. fail succeed figure out how she fits into the world. school is for education. life lessons you have to go through. him being there to hand feed her his experience doesn't help;p her. it stunts her growth. he's going her his experience. that can not and should not take the place of her own experience. thats why as i said i think youth belongs to the inexperienced... so they can com, e into their own., just like ion sure he did. he doesn't have the experience he has bc some woman 15 years older taught him. if hew did then its more understandable why he wouldn't see a problem with it. but if he int i think its selfish and unethical to deny her experience bc he feels like having young skin. its hypocritical.

      leave youth to the young.

  • Yes. But it depends on how mature you are. But Then it sucks cause you guys won't be able to relate on a lot of levels. You can't go to a bar with him when he wants you too&you can't take him to parties with your friends cause he might feel too old. I've dated older men, it's a plus cause they are mature but there was so much things I couldn't do with them cause I wasn't 21. I'm dating a guy my age now and I have to say it a lot better in some ways. It just depends on both of you guys, honestly

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    • not all young guys' are immature. the ones who are are rely on reliving their youth with a 20 year old when in their 30s. if women stopped indulging them in their older years they would take more accountability in their younger years. of you want a young partner then dont pass it up when you're young. otherwise deal with what you missed out on. dont expect other people to make up for your lost experiences that you chose to pass up.

    • im not making anyone pass up anything based off of my experience, she asked a question and I answered it from my experience, that's why I said "it just depends on both of you guys, honestly" you're giving your opinion and so was I. I'm not demanding anything or saying for her not to do it. @azara

  • It's very creepy and concerning...
    But that's just my point of view.

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  • No it's not. I like guys that age too and have dated them before. You're an adult and are allowed to make your own decisions.

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  • Personally, I think it is. A lot can happen in 14 years.

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  • It sounds fine.

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  • There are so many stories about successful relationships and the age gap was never in issue. David Tennant and Georgia Moffett dated and then got married the age gap was 13 years. He was 37 and she was 24 when they started dating then got married. However you are just 19 I think it's better to learn more and to gain more experience. that's my opinion.

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  • That's not too big of a gap, and Im sure you have a good relationship.

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  • But he is a creep. He's robbing the cradle

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