Is it too early to ask for sex with my girlfriend (3 weeks together), she is also my very first girlfriend?

So it's been on my mind a lot cause i'm 20 years old and she is my first girlfriend and like for the past week i been thinking about sex. I known her for a year now. I think it would great to have sex cause she is a virgin, now the problem is i'am not sure if she is ready but further more do you think i should ask for sex 3 weeks into the relationship or am rushing too fast?

I'am just so happy with her and want to take things to the next step, but is 3 weeks ok or will she get bad and break up with me? What do you think?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • you can talk about it see how she feels about it. but dont ask for it. it should happen bc you both want tool. its not like asking her to get you some graham crackers lol

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    • lol ok, i will talk about it but not ask if you know what i mean.

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    • yup, thanks again :)

    • sure sand umm you probably figured it out but typos* yappo= you're bedding -= being:)

What Girls Said 6

  • If you're starting to think about it then maybe start small, when you're making out grab her chest and sides, rub her crotch over clothes and see if she does the same. Some girls will take this as a hint that you want a blowjob and if she's never done it before it may be weird for her.
    Continue doing this over a few days and start going further, like maybe going into her pants with your hand over underwear and then under, see how she responds to being touched and if she seems eager for it. Try and finger her and see what her reaction is, if she's a cirgin shell probably be nervous and or right so just use one finger at first. Make sure she's wet and get the wetness on a finger first before you put it in, ddt fingers hurt. Go slow and if she likes that take it out and ask if she wants a second finger. If she does then rub your fingers together to get them both wet and do it with two. Make sure she likes it and if she uses her hand to guide you take that as a good sign!
    When you guys are comfortable doing this third add stuff then maybe talk about doing it. Maybe just get naked and cuddle for the hell of it so you can get comfortable around each other while naked, then make out and do sexy stuff while naked.
    Take this gradually, but just because it's been three weeks doesn't mean it's 'too' early.

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    • I'm sorry for all my spelling mistakes! Ask if you don't understand anything lol

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    • Think about waiting until you guys say "I love you" it might make it that much more special :)

    • we have been getting more and more touchy, but i mean i will keep this in mind

  • It depends on the girl. But personally no. I've heard many bad things from people who were couples but rushed things when they didn't even know each other that well. So what I'm trying to say is that you should know her more before you do so, and vise versa. Three weeks may seem like a lot, but think about if you really want to have sex with her, think about a married couple (I know that's a bit too far ahead), does it seem like they rushed? But at the same time you've been thinking about it for a week or so, but there's no guarantee it's not a phase. Assuming you're a virgin too, do you really want to give it to her? I know you may love her but think about the bigger picture and tell me if you could see you two together for life.

    Oh shoot... lol. Sorry. I know this is my opinion but I guess I was thinking too much about my own preferences. I'm one of those people who really value your first time. first kiss, and etc. I had planned before not to lose my virginity unless the guy seemed like The One, but I would have been open to sexual acts. And it worked for me I guess. Sorry for pushing it. Anyway just think it through, in the end you should be asking yourself because deep inside, believe it or not, you know what to do, you just need reassurance.

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    • yes i can picture us two together, i known her for a bout a year now, we click and everything is well but i will wait for sex.

    • Nice to hear, but in the end you'll do what you'll do, so right now I just want to say good luck. Also if you guys do work out well as a "forever" couple, that's rare. Barely any couples can last without a divorce and etc. just knowing each other for a year.

    • I talked to her about it and she is not ready which i understand. She got sad cause i was kinda sad but i assured her that i love her and that i can wait until she is ready. If we both get married it would be a dream aha :) But i will respect her decision and always be by her side

  • I would consider breaking up with you if you mentioned that to me that early in the relationship. I mean it is good to talk about sex but not to say you want it already after it has only been 3 weeks

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    • ok thank you for the advice, i will just talk to her about it

  • If you've know her for a year you should kinda know more or less what kinda girl she is and if you should ask or not. I think it's too soon but you've know her for a year and I don't know how exactly good you guys are with each other. But if it was me I'd be kinda turned off by it. You're time will come to have sex. If you ask ease into it

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    • yeah you are correct. ok thank you for the advice, i will just talk to her about it in 2 weeks, but not ask for it

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    • Yeah it is a big thing for girls. Bleeding is sometimes cause the first time I didn't bleed and I told him I didn't bleed so the next time he made sure I did. Well if you love her and she feels the same I wish you guys nothing but happiness ☺️

      It's fine lol I hope so too:)

    • thanks :) best for you too! i hope the guy you find treats you like a princess :)

  • okay do nottt ask for sex, cuz she may feel pressured to say yes or may say no and not really mean it. what you could do is just make out with her and just let it happen and if she stops you then you know she's not ready but if she lets you touch her and has good reaction to every thing that happens then she probably wants it just as bad as you. But i personally think 3 weeks is great and honestly i would have already made a move if i were you and if she really cares about you she won't breakup with you or even get mad. girls have needs too, just go for it.

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    • ok thank you for the advice, i will just talk to her about it and see from there

  • If both you are ready, then why not? Personally though, I've always found it better to wait a while to make sure I'm not basing my feelings for the guy on our first sexual encounter. Nothing wrong with taking things slow.

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    • And you think it would be awesome because she's a virgin? Please tell me that's not the only reason..

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    • Absolutely not. Gentle the first time- communicate with her on what feels alright. It's your first time- let it be slow and intimate. Enjoy your moment together. Moving fast doesn't automatically make sex pleasurable-especially not if it's her first time. And just being realistic, but you'll also last longer if you take it slow. And I'm sure she'll appreciate that.

    • ok, thanks for the help

What Guys Said 6

  • Do NOT ask her for sex. You guys are young and the relationship is still very new and exciting! Don't mess it up by putting that much pressure in her. Her being a virgin is NOT what makes sex great!

    Sexual intimacy is suppose to happen spontaniously. Both people need to be in the right frame of mind and under the right circumstances. If it doesn't just happen on it's own then do NOT force it. Timing is so essential for sex to be wonderful. You are both inexperienced and if your not careful you could ruin a good thing. So enjoy the relationship as it is for now.
    Don't worry! If it's right, then it will happen. ON ITS OWN!

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    • this is how i see it:)

    • ok thank you for the advice, i will just talk to her about it, not say i want to have sex. I will do this down the road. thanks again

  • Don't ask her for sex out of the blue. It's way too intimidating. Ask her to go on a weekend away with you. Go somewhere special, (and make it really special) and then when you're there, in that perfectly happy moment, ask her then. Be prepared to be turned down.

    This way, it's not so intimidating, and even if she turns you down, you're having a good time anyway.

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  • OK You don't ask her for sex, you just try and get more and more physical and lead into sex and see how she responds

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  • Three weeks is fine.

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  • I would say no. But it's whatever you two are comfortable with. If it's both your first times you might just want to wait a while longer. It never hurt. But if you're ready and she's ready, go for it. Just talk about it. Best of luck my friend. :)

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  • Just let it happen naturally man. One day you two will be in the right circumstances and it will happen. Be patient.

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