What would you think about a 14yo dating a 19yo?

I just noticed something. Those age gaps get more and more insignificant as you get older. Take this age gap: 5 years. If a 11yo was to date a 16yo, everyone would lose their shit. But if it's a 40yo and 45yo, no one thinks it's weird, it's completely normal. I think I'm going to get mixed responses for 14-19.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think it's a "massive" deal, as long as they both treat the relationship with some level of parlance and maturity.

    Most 14 year old girls I've met seem to be okay with it anyway, though the problem is teens around that age are horny as shit and end up letting their hormones dictate things for them, so it becomes this weird scenario where you've got a horny 14 year old essentially wanting to fuck a legal adult and ehh... I dunno.

    Again, not against it, it just requires the right mindset.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're right it won't matter once you're older... But you're not older. It's 5 years! You're in what 6th 7th grade? And he's in college if he even went.

    It's just wrong sex will be next which is illegal and he'll only be using you. Not to mention the fact that you're not mature haven't fully went through puberty yet and he has. Oh and more than likely you're gonna break up and it hurts like hell when you lose someone around your age so think about when he leaves you for someone gos own age or older because you couldn't do things that he can.

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    • Think about it this way... You know how you said 40 and 45 isn't a big difference and and you're trying to say 14 and 19 shouldn't be either?

      Well fine let's say it's not then in that case would you be comfortable dating a really cute 9yr old? I mean it is only a 5yr difference?

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    • I was being sarcastic hopefully you wouldn't...

    • I have a feeling we don't understand each other here

What Guys Said 9

  • It's not the age difference that matters one jot. It's the absolute age that the individual people are. Particularly the younger one. In a previous question that got deleted, I stated that in the UK, I don't believe there's anything illegal about pure dating. By dating, I mean setting a date and time to meet for any innocent reason. "Come to my house and we'll watch a film". It's only if sexual things happen that legal issues arise. 14 and 19? Might raise a few eyebrows, and get a few comments like "Cradle snatcher". Might be parent issues, too!

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  • That's not dating, that's babysitting.

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  • It's maturity differences. Basically past mid 20's you kind of plateau in terms of mental development. The difference between an 11 year old and a 16 year old is significantly difference. Same with 14 and 19. Trust me you'll be a different person in those 5 years.

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    • Of course I'll be. But that doesn't mean I'm less than you right now or should be respected less.

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    • Isn't saying he needs to be very immature to date me saying I'm very immature myself?

      Okay, believe it or not, I know more than most adults in my developing Muslim country about sex. What can get you pregnant, STDs, etc. This will not happen, 14 or 35. I know better. I also know to speak up in the situation of physical abuse. I don't mean to attack you, but you ARE underestimating me. Theoric knowledge has a value.

    • You may be mature but you will get more mature as you get older. A mature 19 year old still should be more mature than a mature 14 year old. There are people more mature than me that are older but that doesn't make me immature for where I am in life. If a 19 year old is the same maturity as a 14 year old it means he's immature it doesn't mean she is. I've said that several times now. Trust me, he can deceive you. People poke tiny holes in condoms that you could never notice. Trust me there is ALWAYS a risk when it comes to STD's and pregnancy if you get physical. You can reduce the risk but that doesn't get rid of the risk. If I was the same maturity of a 25 year old it probably means that 25 year old is immature. Them being immature doesn't make me immature. They may be 25 but have the mind of a 21 year old. You may be mature and have the mind of a 14 year old which is fine because you're 14 but a 19 year old having the mind of a 14yr old is wrong because he's much older.

  • 14 and 19 is a little much. It's illegal is most places other than like Brazil and Sweden.

    Other than that, if you actually get along with that age gap, you'll probably grow apart in a couple years, but as long as you, him, and your parents are ok with it, there shouldn't be an issue.

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  • It's because a 5 and an 11 year old are at different stages of life. A 40 and a 45 year old are relatively at the same stage.
    In my opinion, a 15 and a 19 year old is wrong because the 15 year old is still a child basically and a 19 year old is a young adult. Not to mention that he would get in trouble with police and put on a sex offender's list but if he wants to take that risk then whatever

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    • You think a 15yo is a mindless child? I must be a baby then.

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    • God, you really are a child.

    • Knew you would say that.

  • That logic doesn't work until 19/24 - 14/19 is totally wrong.

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  • Because a frikin 11 year old isn't old enough to comprehend dating and shouldn't there frikin 11 same goes for a 12, 13, 14 ,15 and some 16 and 17 year olds the legal age of consent in the u. s. is 18 and even then some of those girls/guys act like 12 year olds I've heard your not full adult until 30 and seeing some of the posts on here from 20-29 year olds i believe it

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    • You have only one point here, and you clearly misundertood me. I have no choice, I'm blocking you.

  • My friend is 21 and she dated a 40 year old for 2 months, but they broke up. I wasn't sure of the details as too why, but I know he had 2 daughters that were the same age as my friend, so it would have been like fucking his daughter.. awkward.

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  • It seems worse because of the percentage of your life it is.

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What Girls Said 10

  • At those two specific ages the developmental phase is no where near the same.

    It just looks wrong!

    When two people adult ages
    21 and 26
    30 and 35
    40 and 45
    It evens out!

    A 14 year old is just starting high school.
    A 19 year old is sophomore year into college.

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    • Dear God...

    • You're set in your ways.
      You seem to think your way is right and aren't at least OPEN to seeing other peoples points (by the looks or your comments).
      I don't know why you would ask this question if you aren't at least open-minded.

    • Then you are wrong. I don't give the same response to everyone. But by the time you commented, it got repetitive.

  • I think it's because your a minor and he/she is not... so it's illegal in a lot of places

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    • I'm not talking about law. As long as everyone is happy, authorities don't need to know anything. Also, I don't think you can get arrested if you don't have sex.

  • I think it's weird. When your an adult you only really change every ten years. As a teen/kid you change significantly every years.
    I honestly don't find highschool kids attractive and I'm 19. They looks so young even when they're 17 or 18. Also I don't know about other bu I was very awkward looking at 14 and not very pretty.

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    • That's the problem, people here think I'm in that awkward state I went through when I'm 12-13. I have changed significantly. I don't think I'll make big changes often after this point.

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    • Once again never say never. Highschool is a weird time

    • Also I'll say 8th grade just because you haven't experienced 9th grade yet

  • What 19 year old with the right mind would date 14 year old girl. Not only he can get in trouble with the law but do you guys even have anything in common? At 14 you are still kind of a child, and because I know you are immaturely just going to turn my worlds to your own side, I will just ask you a question: Have you even gotten your period yet?

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  • Gross AF. Fucking pedophiles do that.

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  • If you're 14, you aren't a consenting adult. Also that's statutory rape. All 40-45 year olds are adults. Also I agree with @Xelebrum. It's not cool to date your babysitter.

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  • I'm 15, and I like a guy who's 18, and will be 19 next month. Not really a big deal when you hit 18.

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  • I don't think it's that bad but be careful. Older guys like to take advange of younger girls. Don't give your virginty to him bc most likey that's what he is after but I'm not sure.

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  • It is disgusting, tbh.

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  • 👉🏽👌🏽 ew in my opinion not because of age but physical maturity

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    • Not everyone is the same. I'm 14 and have a body that looks more mature than most my friends. Only my face gives it away.

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