Why can't some people handle the fact that online dating/apps are all about looks?

You can google an endless amount of experiments and anecdotes that prove the notion that not just men, but women go for looks online, yet the silly "how tos" that are supposed to instruct average men on how to "succeed" in online dating never seem to die. Sometimes there is even hostility when you challenge the idea that men's chances with online dating can be changed much with anything but good pics. Why can't people accept reality? Is it just that they can't handle the truth of their sexual market value?

Any guy that doubts this could set up a fake tinder or other profile with an unknown male model pic and compare the responses to what their real pics get. But they won't do this.

  • They simply can't handle the truth due to individual weakness
    80% (4)50% (3)64% (7)Vote
  • It's deep seated human psychology
    20% (1)50% (3)36% (4)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, I wasn't interested in my ex because of his looks. I was into to him because he was extremely polite, passionate, and intelligent. He wasn't super attractive but he was very good with his words.
    If you're just looking for sex then yeah dating sites are all about looks but if you're actually looking for a relationship women won't be as focused on looks.

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    • Few women take online dating sites seriously, they don't respect the guys on them. Which is why the only way to get noticed is with looks. In person women want their asses kissed if the guy is average-looking boyfriend-material. But if the guy stirs primal physicality, it doesn't matter what he says or how he acts.

Most Helpful Guy

  • " Is it just that they can't handle the truth of their sexual market value?" That's #exactly the problem since everyone wants to feel wanted by somebody, right? Which is why they'll never come to terms with the reality of this situation (online dating in this case).

    "Any guy that doubts this could set up a fake tinder or other profile with an unknown male model pic and compare the responses to what their real pics get. But they won't do this" #Agreed but in my case I could just use my own #face and have a bunch of thirsty girls inboxing me and as long as I didn't say anything that was blatantly disrespectful to them they'd put up with it just hoping yo go out with me LOL.

    i1127.photobucket.com/.../ezgif.com-add-text.gif

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    • their situation *
      to go out*

    • If you say so, but I've consistently seen experiments where male model pics act like retards and the girls were still interested.

    • Agreed, since he's hot (catfish's pic) he can get away with that ^_^

What Girls Said 1

  • i can handle it. hahaha
    some people dont want to take time to know people they aren't physically attracted to. its not realy fair, but it makes sense.

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    • "some"? Most (if not all).

    • maybe most. defintely not all.
      its not fair. but thats just the way it is.
      i think everybody has experienced it at one point or another.

What Guys Said 1

  • It takes trauma, extreme willpower, or outside intervening to change ones ego-investments. Without one of those three things they will continue to try to justify their failures to outside sources. Having money helps too.

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    • Having money while being ugly only helps your chances of being a provider, not genuinely desired in online dating. You would do well at a sugar daddy site, that's it.

    • If you are looking purely for responses on online dating, mentioning your 100k a year job will definitely raise your chances. I don't use dating sites though, the people they attract are usually delusional.

    • 100k? Maybe 1m.

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