Why can't I find a boyfriend?

im not the hottest girl around but many people at work say im pretty, i can't seem to find a boyfriend and men dont even look much at me. im scared of online dating fear of rejection. i live in new york dont know where to meet guys.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It may be because of the environment you are in. For instance, back when I was a reasonable stud muffin 30+ years ago, I didn't have a girlfriend easily because I went to a nerd college that was 80% men. I hardly even knew any women.

    So, tell us about your everyday life and maybe we can give some advice.

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    • good point i always suspected it was where i live too, like my neighborhood its a lot of ethnic communities very segregated, and then new york in general, all i do is go to work 5 days, i go grocery shopping, library, and thats about it. i dont go clubbing or bar hopping not really my thing unless its someone birthday. i dont know what places to go to meet men.

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    • very good point! yea i can probably look into a language class or cooking... i also go to coffee shops a lot... and food places too

    • Cooking classes are good because the way you can "study" together is cook together and that is almost always a great date. Language classes are useful, but will likely have more women then men. Consider taking a class in auto mechanics or computers or website design. Think about what guys are into and that is the sort of thing in which you want to get involved. Furthermore, if a guy whose into the subject that you are taking can tutor you, then it is even better...

Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you just have to be a bit more confident, guys usually go for the girls that look naturally confident and that are happy with themselves and by the looks of it your not very confident:/

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What Guys Said 9

  • People at work, when talking to a woman about anything sex or dating, are IN A HOSTILE SITUATION.

    Basically, don't trust anything anyone says at work. They have one thing on their mind: not getting fired.

    I'm not saying you're ugly. In fact, if you're willing to be the suitor, that's not even that important.

    I'd look more along the internal for clues. For instance, you fear rejection. That, itself, will do it. You gotta get over that. You're going to get rejected, and it's going to hurt. The more you do it, the better you are equipped to deal with it.

    Also, you could be a really bad misandrist and not even know it. Most women in the united states, especially the feminist capital of the united states, are indoctrinated into hating (or denigrating) men.

    One remark about patriarchy or oppression, toxic masculinity, rape culture, or victim-blaming and it's OVER (feminists).

    One remark about the fragile male ego, how men only think with their dicks, or any hint at us being emotionally stunted, or unsophisticated, and it's OVER (traditionalists).

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  • Church singles groups are a good place

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    • eeeeeh im not a church girl i do see hot guys in the gym though

  • Girls forget that many have to actually initiate in some way or another if they want attention. Don't just expect guys to do all the work, we are scared too

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  • you are pathetic. men have to deal with rejection all of the time. Next time you reject a man, do it gently because you can't even approach, sexist

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  • If you say you're hot, nine times out of ten you're not.

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  • That is thing when girls say they are hot that word turns me off
    then wonder why their single ,.

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  • 6 Reason that you cant/can find a boyfriend
    1: Dont be lame, lazy or Cold
    2: Try to Look! a guy first if he looks you back that means he is gone come for you
    3: Maybe the most people you find they are already in a relationship
    4: Maybe some people fell in love with you and they are shy
    5: Try to be more attractive dont show boobs butt or they only think you find is sex
    6: Always go with you girlfriends out to a nightclub/club/ (Never go to a bar to find a great guy)

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  • You live in New York, you say you're pretty and don't know where to meet guys? Idiot.

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    • enlighten me then.

    • You're pretty, you live in New York and you can't even help yourself. How can I?

    • @Xylem, not all people are naturally gifted when. it comes to dating!

  • Work on your body, try to increase your sexyness. That way more guys will take a liking!
    Would you say you were pretty and have a nice bod?

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What Girls Said 1

  • It helps if you get to know someone who is infatuated with you.

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