Going to see my ex girlfriend after a few years, any tips?

I reached out to her first because I will be visiting her city for both personal and business reasons. She replied in an excited manner and gave me her # over social media. I'm not expecting to get back together or sleep with her, rather just to catch up. What I don't know is what she may want. Additionally, she has a boyfriend so I am little shocked (she doesn't know that I know this). My ex is a very pretty girl with a sexual charisma I have only seen in a few women in my lifetime. She is a very spontatneous but rationally minded girl.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Just make sure you don't start anything. Don't give her any reasons to start anything either.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Spontaneous but rationally minded? That's a paradox right there. If you are rational, you think things through and evaluate the outcome. If you are spontaneous you act on a whim without giving a situation much thought... Take your pick!

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What Guys Said 1

  • Ex girlfriends are difficult to be around due to all the history you both share. But she was someone you cared about and it isn't a bad thing to want to see her. I would advise yo to avoid talking about anything that would stir up too much emotion. Just keep the conversation basic: what she's doing, new dog? etc etc etc
    You're going to see her because you probably still feel things for her. Those feelings don't just turn off, sometimes never do. So just be careful. She has a boyfriend, so don't put her in a position she'll hate you for later. You're a good guy so just focus on the important thing: seeing her again and catching up.

    I'm curious and don't expect an answer, but why did you break up?

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    • I don't know why I didn't give you the MHO, probably couldn't see all the opinions on my phone. We had dated for a few months, then she broke up with me because of college. Then we started dating again and doing a long distance relationship (bad choice on my part). She eventually cheated and we never spoke again for years. A close friend at the time did tell me she was asking about me numerous times long after our breakup but didn't begin to speak to her until 2 weeks ago. We've made plans to meet up and afterwards I got an "unknown call" literally 25 mins after our last text. I'm suspecting it's her, but why make it unknown? Nervousness?

    • Also, the reason why I'm going back is for mainly business reasons. The city she lives in has a few vital connections, so I thought what the hell let me give it a shot and message her...

    • I know you still have lingering feelings for her. But focus on the future. Don't worry about the MHO, everyone's opinion is important

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