Should I stay with him or should I go?

Recently I made it official with a guy I'm seeing. I was hesitant to start dating him at first but I thought I'd give him a chance. He lives in the city and I live in the suburbs right outside the city so I'd always drive to him. He'd always ask me to come over or can you take me to work. Then I found myself paying for basically everything. I met some of his friends and also his family members and he said he had fallen for me so I didn't think he was using me. Then Monday we went out to eat and movies I paid for everything once again. I told him about my concern and he apologized. The next day he talked to me about how he won't be able to really do much with his money after the next few pay checks because he has debt to pay. So basically for a short term he won't be able to use any of his money on me. I'm at a point where I don't know what to do I want to be with him but I don't think I can. Should I stay in the relationship or should I just leave now?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well just because he doesn't have much money doesn't mean you should break up with him if you like him. Although it is a little shady if he asks you to go out and then doesn't pay. Maybe in the short term you could do activities together that don't cost much, like stay in and cook or go for walks?

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    • Yah I'll give it a try I just don't want to be used. And after we had that conversation the next day he asked me for a ride to work.

    • Yeah that seems a little odd, if you haven't been together for long or you don't feel like he's worth it you might want to try and keep looking for someone else.

Most Helpful Girl

  • If you're UNHAPPY then leave the relationship, I was in a similar situation and it really pissed me off, except the fact that he actually had money to spend. It sucks that he's in debt but it really wouldn't be the end of the world if he got you something small, or whilst hanging out at his, he got you guys a bottle of wine (if you drink) or even cooked you dinner, you guys don't always have to go out, or do expensive things, but it can be become tiresome to always have to pay for things. Yes debt is a bitch and he needs to focus on that before he can really do anything, but it's all about budgeting and he should do so, so he can pay his debt off and make you happy in a little small ways x

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What Guys Said 2

  • I wouldn't deal with that. You are putting in way more than your fair share. As a guy I don't mind paying for a bit more than she does, but if it isn't close to 50/50 I won't date her for very long.

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    • So I ended up breaking it off with him and I said that this isn't the relationship I wanted and maybe some time down the road when you have everything all together it can work out. He now wants to delete me from his life. When I want to still be friends but oh well.

    • You are a few years younger than I am so I'll tell you this. As you go through your 20s you will have many friends who come and go. Sometimes people remove you from their life, and sometimes it is you who cuts ties. Either way don't worry about it you will make new friends.

  • You should just leave now.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Are there dates you guys can do that aren't as pricy for the time being? Maybe you guys can cook together or go for a walk if its nice outside. Dates in a city can be really pricy, so I get how you feel.
    But if this honestly makes you unhappy, then end it.

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