Help!! Found out my date for TONIGHT has a girlfriend! What should I do?

I met him 3yrs ago on OkCupid. We have never met in person even though we live only a couple cities away. Our entire relationship has been through texting.

When we first met our schedules conflicted. We have gone periods with zero contact when I've been in relationships usually at the result of me disappearing on him.

There are times we could have met but i sometimes get an off feeling from him when we talk. It's not that he's not real, i know he is. But sometimes he's overly sexual. And he's got a weird look in his eyes on his pictures. I can't explain it, he's very attractive just off.

Anyway run in the same music scene and found out that we'll be at the same show tomorrow night so for the first time ever meeting is inevitable. We decided to meet up tonight since we're going to the show together and want one on one time the first time we meet.

He keeps saying he wants us to be together, that he loves me, that he'll never hurt me. I just don't trust him.

So finally i decided to calm my fears over the type of guy he is and look him up on facebook. Sure i would feel better if i saw he was just a regular guy with regular friends.

But there it was, a profile picture of him and his GIRLFRIEND.

So now what do I do?

Tell him i saw his facebook? Tell him i know? Cancel plans? Wait it out? Three years seems like too long to just mess with someone and i dont want to seem crazy for looking him up.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Why on earth are you ignoring your uneasy feelings about this guy. Trust your intuition!

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What Guys Said 8

  • If you sure its his girlfriend, I'd recommend cancelling any type of meeting. Don't let yourself become a side bitch.

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  • Tell him you saw FB and cut contact. He has lied to you.

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  • How do you she's his gf?

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  • cancle cancle cancle. thats fucked up. tell the girlfriend. let her know how much of an asshole this guy is

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  • How do you know that she is his girlfriend?

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    • There were a few more pictures of them together, locked in a tight embrace and whatnot. This one they are obviously at a fancy dinner. And friends and family commented with things like "such a happy couple" "so glad you found the woman of your dreams" i would love to say its old but it's from a few nights ago.

  • Are you sure it's his girlfriend? It might as well be a friend of his.

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    • There were a few more pictures of them together, locked in a tight embrace and whatnot. This one they are obviously at a fancy dinner. And friends and family commented with things like "such a happy couple" "so glad you found the woman of your dreams" i would love to say its old but it's from a few nights ago.

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    • I don't think i need more confirmation.
      i did though and she lives about an hour away and has kids of her own. I know him well enough to know he's not the type of guy to date long distance and doesn't want to play step dad. But he seems to put on a great front. Calling her babe and asking how her kids are and saying them and she are beautiful in every picture.
      Im more sad that he's obviously so unhappy with his life but i don't know how to tell him i know and can't see him without admitting i looked him up and seeming crazy.

    • Yes you should admit it. Confront the guy about it. You're finally meeting him... And he's cheating...
      He's playing with your heart, but the other girl's heart as well.

      Whatever happens after it... You should start looking for someone else. 3 years online is a long time, by the way.

  • Many it was a old photo my face book page first picture in 6 years old

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  • Cancel the date... tell him you don't date guys in relationships... unless you like that kinda stuff.

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What Girls Said 8

  • He is Not only a Cheat Sheet here, dear, but behind the Computer Curtain he has been Cheating you and with Facebook to show his true colors at last, there is this picture of him With... The past.
    It seems she is Also part of his Present and the writing on the wall and all is telling me this loser wants his cake and Eat it two and is keeping you both Close at hand so he can have what he wants as a So-called... Man with a yellow stripe down his back.
    It's your choice, your call. You wasted a few years of your life but if you continue, more Strife will follow because you would be caught up in what I refer to as a "Triangle Threesome," where you are way at the top, looking down, side to side at him and His... GIRLFRIEND.
    Tell him you are sorry but until you have proof in this semi sweet pudding that she is anything but a soul mate, you are not going to compete with a skeleton who has come out of the closet and is rattling your chains.
    BTW: I don't Trust him neither. His kind out there plays the violin more times than I can Say: Skip to my loo, my darling.
    Good luck. xx

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  • Dumb him directly with no second thought!
    1- he couldn't be honest with his relation
    2- he just accepted to meet up because it was inevitable not because he can't wait to see you!
    3- he talks a lot about sex? obviously he only uses you to be his sex-mate nothing more!
    4- so basically he is cheating on his girlfriend with you, what would you expect from him?
    Just leave him without explaining anything he doesn't worth it! He couldn't find time to tell you about and so are you! Move on and leave him your right man is waiting for you sonewhere else ;)

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  • I would definitely cancel and tell him you know about his girlfriend. I would personally go a step further and tell his girlfriend how much of a sleaze this guy is.

    They may be in an open relationship, but he would have stated it, I would think.

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  • You should confront him about the girl on his picture

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  • Break it off and tell the gurl.

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  • call up his girlfriend and tell her to meet you guys there. that way this BOY learns a lesson and can hopefully become a MAN when he treats his next girlfriend with respect.

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  • just don't go on a date with him

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  • Cancel plans. He has a girlfriend and he just wants sex

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