How long should you date someone before you sleep in the same bed?

We are not in a relationship and have been talking for a month and gone on 7 dates. She isn't the type of person to take things fast and we didn't even kiss until our 4th date. Last night she spent the night for a movie and we had a cuddle session and talked a few hours after the movie. It was 2 am and she left my apartment. I asked her if she wanted to spend the night cause we both had a few drinks and she didn't want to and drove home instead. I know she isn't the type to take things fast but still after 7 dates I wish she would comfortable enkught to at least share share a bed without me trying to have sex.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Why are you not exclusive after 7 dates? All that means is that you aren't dating other people, usually happens on the 3rd date for me. (they asked me to be their GF-in a relationship, theirs only, etc.)

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    • In that case we are but were not to the point where we say were in a relationship or are ready to post on social media. We are not seeing other people but we haven't been dating long enough to say its serious.

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Guys Said 4

  • Most people would say "There is no answer / Every relationship is different / Do whatever makes both of you happy" but since you asked the question looking for a definite answer, I'll give you the one I live by.

    I would never share a bed with a girl over night unless I was ready to marry her / have sex with her. It's not a matter of trust, its just a matter of not being stupid. If a man and woman who are heavily attracted to each other sleep in the same bed enough times, they're going to end up having sex, because that is how their bodies are designed to behave.

    So, asking to share a bed is like asking to have sex, because sooner or later, when you're both really turned on, and your minds are only half awake, you're going to end up having sex.

    If you're not trying to have sex, I do not recommend sleeping in the same bed. Next time, you should offer to have one of you sleep on the couch so that she can have a place to stay if driving home is not safe.

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  • " I asked her if she wanted to spend the night cause we both had a few drinks and she didn't want to and drove home instead. "

    ^as u said she's not da type of person to take things fast... so she avoided stayin da night after knowin each other for a month only.

    maybe she'll request it on her own when she wants to

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    • I guess I still wouldn't have tried anything though and I hope she knows that.

  • 7 dates isn't exactly that many. Everyone is different, be patient.
    Some sleep over on the first date some may not sleep with you til you marry her.

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  • If you've been together for that long and no sex, move on.

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