Girls, no female friends or girlfriend?

I don't have any female friends. I'm 18, and graduated high school and will go to CSUEB in the fall. I've talked to chicks before, but we're more acquaintances. when I ask them to hang, I say "wanna hang out sometime in the summer" or you free anytime? I'm not looking for a date, just a mere hangout (as a final way of seeing them before college). everytime I saw a girl, she had a clique that she didn't separate from, had a boyfriend, or was busy with schoolwork. in their free time, they hang with their girlfriends in part of their cliques. I don't know what I do wrong. I'm nice and do talk to everyone (I'm shy, but won't shut up around a friend/nice person). these girls would also give me weird looks if I asked to meet their friends. I guess hs cliques affected my ability to make friends in high school (this did apply to guys). I just think that there are places and activities to go to and do with girls, unlike guys (go to a cupcake shop/Beyonce concert). I met a girl in beginning of year, but didn't really notice her til April. and I asked her to hang in June, and she was initially open to it, but plans didn't fall through. I have a pretty hard time making friends with girls AND guys. is being nice a problem? do nice guys finish last? if I can't even make friends (male OR female), how'd I go out with a social circle (want it to be guys AND girls), or get a frat formal date? my disability to make friends (I'm autistic) has made me depressed and my grades tanked. I have no money for a therapist. I find it best to make friends in an open environment, but don't get invited to parties. does college host social mixers? especially commuter campuses? I have a social circle of 5 guys and 1 girl, but we don't hang much due to summer classes/jobs/college prep. what can I do? (don't say be more social or be nice).


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Hopefully once you start college, you'll meet new people and become friends. I met quite a bit at uni, both male and females. And they are all quite different, not clique-y at all.

    I prefer surrounding myself with positive people, so being nice and respectful is a must. I honestly met new friends during class, either sitting near someone or pairing up for group assignments. There are a lot of activities and events on campus, too, which helped. I do believe there were mixers as well. :) I am shy and suffer from anxiety (I have even fainted at school a few times).

    I would enjoy your time at college! I hope you have fun and meet positive new people and/or a girlfriend. :)

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    • is college better socially?

    • For me, I found it to be so. People are there because they want a higher education, whereas high school you kind of have to be there (or home schooled). Most of the people were nice, and once I got used to the campus I felt pretty comfortable. :)

    • Thanks for MHO!

What Girls Said 4

  • My experience is meet people outside school. I always did on vacation or out at a fun zone 4-H special clubs volunteering at the hospital or zoo. Get a cool job as a lifeguard at a water park or funzone. Be around the happy. They will associate you with the mood. It is easier to talk to people when you have a job. I couldn't meet people in school either. I met tons of people outside school. It is good for the esteem because it proves it isn't you it is them. You will meet people in college people are not worried about fitting in and social suicide. I limped. I was pretty and nice and ideal I dressed cute I was a great friend. It was them not me. They couldn't see past my limp. So when they hit on me after high school I was like F No!!! I needed you back In the dAy I have confidence now. You were too worried about dating someone vulnerable that wasn't a wrung up in the social ladder. Now u married a shallow cunt. Ha! Go figure

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  • Most guys only have guy friends so it's not unusual. 18 is still rather young, a lot of people your age have never had a relationship either so don't be down on yourself.

    You live your life, focus on you and you will eventually bump into new people, that is if you let yourself experience new things. Say yes to parties and other group gatherings, even if you don't know the majority of people there.

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    • I'm not looking for a relationship. I'm looking for friends, which I got very few in hs due to cliques.

  • I totally get you. Im shy af and rarely hang out with guys maybe just one but with my gal friends. It's really hard hanging out with people let alone have a relationship when you're really shy

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  • tip: do not call girls/women chicks.

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