Why did he ask me on a second date if we have nothing in common?

We went on one date. He was attractive, but we had nothing in common in terms of lifestyle, interests, hobbies etc. I thought that was the end of it, but he recently sent a message saying he had a good time, and that he'd really like to see me again soon. This confused me as we seemed like complete opposites and there was no chemistry.

Are some men just likely to ask for a second date based on attraction only, and not common interests etc?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • did he call you since then? Maybe he said it to be nice at the time, but will not call. If you think you both have nothing in common, and you do not think you could have a relationship with him, then, if he calls, turn it down. Still, do you really know enough about him to make this call. If you only know him from dating, you have not yet scratched the surface. This is why., in the old days, people dated for a while before they started to think about getting serious. Today, is seems many people go out, have sex on the first or second date, and never really get to know each other. Some base their attraction on having good sex. Almost any two people, under the right circumstances, can have good sex. Sometimes this blinds a couple from really seeing each other for whom they really are. Sometimes this causes real problems down the line, especially if children are involved. . So, if he wants to know more about you, date him, get to know more about him, and take it slow. Sometimes bad first dates lead to great relationships.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Aside from Both your Good looks here, dear, on his own end, he may have Found Something Enlightening about you that you Missed And... He ask me on a second date.
    The First date may have told him a bit about you but a 'Second' will tell him more in store I am sure. If he wasn't Into You he would have not given you a Second glance or even with romance because Looks are Not everything. Your personality may too have Highlighted something special.
    You may be surprised that with a Second round, you both may have Found... Something in common and lest we Forget... Many times opposites Attract, in fact with a little love potion.
    Good luck. xx

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What Guys Said 30

  • Yeah i wouldn't be surprised if you were referring to me. I share basically no interests with any girl--philosophy, debate, science programming, video games, stock market anaylsis, politics, news, matehamtics, etc. Topics I find petty and useless are fashion, makeup, gossip, celebrities, and of course sports. So thus girls never share anything in common with me. But the reason why i text girls anyways is because i get no where with girls and I just want a girlfriend so bad. Since I have nothing in common with any girls I have no choice but to try anyways with the girl who agreed to a date since otherwise im doomed to infinite lonliness.

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  • 1) he thought there was more in common then you did. I have been on dates where I thought it went great and she gave me the BS answer of "there just wasn't any chemistry"... really? 1 date? whatever...
    or
    2) he just really really really wants to screw you or at least a blow job.

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  • I think you have more in common than you acknowledge. You did go on that first date together. You'll always share the memory of that experience.

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  • some may ask based on an attraction , but most would chalk up the first date to being nervous and hopes the second will flow more naturally and may shed light on things that may have been suppressed on the first go around

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  • Quite frankly, Yes.
    In your mind, you may have been thinking you two have nothing in common so this is dead in the water.
    But in his mind, you were cute, maybe came across as intelligent and a little funny. If I had nothing in common with a girl, but she made me laugh and I liked her personality I would ask her on a second date. Common interests is a plus, but not a requirement.

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  • Hopefulness.
    And sometimes having everything in common isn't the best thing.

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  • That's dating. Sometimes one person wants a second date even though the other felt there was no chemistry. Just say sorry, it's not going to work for me. If he asks why don't answer, just say you aren't feeling it. If he keeps going just disconnect.

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  • Often I'll have a second date even if the first was so-so, simply because you don't really get to know people well enough on a first date (with some exceptions). How many times haven't you had a great first date, then to have a really boring second date?

    That being said, he could just be lonely and grasping for whatever might be in his reach.

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  • For a guy "things in common" is not related to "attractive". So he finds you attractive. And/or maybe he wants sex with you.

    Also you may perceive as i you have nothing in common but maybe he thinks you have plenty common.

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  • Nothing in common is better than nothing at all

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  • Definitely , sexual attraction for a man is often just a matter of you showing up , doesn't mean anything will happen,

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  • Males AND a females hunt the opposite sex for two reasons

    Companionship
    Sex

    You be the judge

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  • Duh he wants to fuck you.

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  • He might find you interesting and change. Maybe he learned something with you.
    A second round seems fair. ;)

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  • You can't always judge a person on basis of one date.
    I would assume he's asking for a second chance

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  • Its possible, but its equally likely he actually had a good time and hopes that you guys might find more common ground on a second date.

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  • Sometimes, opposites attract.

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  • That's the point, to have nothing in common. .. that would give u both the interest to know more about each other...

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  • Some of the best relationships don't have to have anything in common you guys maybe so different that y'all balance each other out. It's a possibility.

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  • If there is no chemistry might be possible there is some physics :D

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  • You sound very hot. Are you hot? If so, a normal guy will literally say anything to see you again.

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  • i guess so

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  • I'm pretty sure it's your looks.

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  • Obviously he felt the date went differently. You should just be straight and say you weren't feeling it with him.

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  • Having different interests is sometimes a good thing

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  • I mean hey he had fun, sometimes that's enough. Maybe he's looking for pleasant company and not worried about all that serious stuff.

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  • I really don't care about shared interests or lifestyle at all.
    It's about being open minded.
    If I'm attracted, like her personality, and have a good time with her, I go for a second date.
    He obviously thought there was chemistry and he really likes you.
    It's just a date after all.

    If you don't want to, simply turn him down.

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  • I guess it's a case of he know's you've nothing in common but wants to give it every chance to work because he wants to settle down with a girl.

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  • He asked you out on a second date because even if you and him do not have anything in common or any chance of being in a relationship... he still hasn't seen you naked or had sex with you and therefore will put up with any crap of yours until that happens.

    See while you are thinking about all the "in commons" you might have, he was thinking "what do I need to do to get her naked."

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  • If I still like her when I go home I try for date two even if we have different interest. Sometimes trying something more out of the box for you can help you grow and end up being pretty interesting.

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What Girls Said 11

  • It could be possible. However, if he really likes you, he would ask you on a date. Did you know that dude before you went out? If yes, he wants to know you better and spend more time with you. If not, well girl attraction is the first thing that makes people want to talk to each other. If I'm not attracted to someone's looks or personality, I won't be making the effort to talk to them more. And chemistry builds over time. For example, my current crush and I got attracted to each other's looks, but it's only when we started to talk that we got even more into each other. So go on that date, and remember that things are awkward only if YOU think it's awkward. Good luck!

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  • If you guys had a great date, laughed and had fun, were attracted to each other and genuinely liked each other, it's worth a second date.

    You don't have to have a lot in common at first; sometimes shared interests will grow over time.

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  • why is common so important.. if you both are different then you can learn and experience new stuff... which would be cool.. doesn't matter if you like it or not..

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  • Probably what you said. Maybe he likes your looks

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  • He wants the V..
    If you're attractive and you didn't have anything in common, he wants the V XD
    Nah, I'm kidding LOL They say opposites attract (in my opinion, they don't)

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  • He wants to fuck u.

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  • If his hobby is having sex then yes he will

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  • Probably he has no one else to spend time with, his friends aren't available for him.

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  • Maybe he likes you.

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  • He just wants to have sex with you and he thinks you didn't notice.

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  • Some men will date a girl if she looks a certain way. Some guys are picky. Also I have met couples that are complete opposites and have different lifestyles and political views but they are in a relationship. I did not get it either. But to answer your question he may just find you physically attractive

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