Is it ok if I go on dates with different guys until I decide which one I want to get to know better?

I've been going on dates with 3 different guys, I've even had second dates with 2 of them. I feel sort of guilty but when I think about it I don't see anything wrong. Thoughts?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You shoyuld not limit yourself to one guy till you know him well and want to be exclusive with him. And the only way you will find the right guy is to date various men till you find the right one. So not only isw there nothing wrong, you are absolutely doing it right. Just don;t tell any of them that he is the only one. You do not need to say you are dating others unless you want to, but do not lie and say you are not.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You are your own Free bird who is Not two birds of a feather with Any One guy here, dear. You don't owe Any of them a living and you certainly don't have to get hooked at the hip over nite with being in a love nest with Any of them.
    Take your time and go slow with your flow. Nurse and nurture a Friendship with each one and just silence is the golden goose egg when it comes to Being with any of Them so there isn't any chance with a possible romance with One of them, that Anything will Go... South.
    For now, no one but you is putting bread on your table so no need to feel Guilt, you are an Innocent bystander.
    Enjoy and just take your time down the Love line. xx

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What Guys Said 25

  • People will be upset if they find out you were dating someone else after a second or third date, but you hold the right to be dating who ever until you say you are exclusive..

    so you can do what you want, but I think most people, despite how liberal dating has become, will be upset.

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  • That is absolutely what you are supposed to do! Play that field, girlie, and increase your odds of finding that special someone! :)

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  • If they know about it, then it's fine. But if they don't you're misleading them.

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  • As long as you're not promising all of them commitment at the same time, you're fine. It's a good idea to talk to different people and dating is a good way to get to know potential options.

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  • thats the definition of dating, you are supposed to try out different people and pick one that suits... in lots of cultures there is no dating but its unhealthy that way, if someone says you are a slut for dating more than one, then they dont know the definition of dating =]

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  • As long as you let those guys know about the others and they're fine with it, then yeah there's nothing wrong with it.

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  • Depends what city your in. In London It's frowned upon to date multiple people but in New York it is considered normal until you find the right guy.

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  • That seems logical.

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  • It's fine, just try not to string any of them along.

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  • I find it to be distasteful but if you let everyone know from the beginning that you are seeing other people then it is less so.

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  • On the second / third date, you might want to tell them if you feel guilty about it. Just so things are clear

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  • As long as it's friendship basis dates should be fine,

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  • It's fine but they probably won't agree

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  • its not like you in a relationship and dating others

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  • In my opinion it's ok as far as you're not lying to the others... that means in a logical time - not more than two weeks - you should clarify and chose the one.

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  • Like pre-employment interview?

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  • 50-50 kind of answer here, its good that your dating different people, but its bad for that reason

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  • I don't see the problem.

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  • That's pretty shitty of you but it sounds like a typical chick thing to do to me

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  • Dates are test drives. You're doing it right.

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  • U should only pick one out of the 2 pick the one that makes u more happy that's what I do ifi were u

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  • This exactly why people stay single way into their 40's.
    Always unable to commit, afraid they'll be missing out, always on the lookout for something better.

    What is wrong with committing to dating one guy, see how it goes, and then decide whether or not to proceed your pursuit?
    Because the next guy may have more to offer.

    If you need to date more than one person at a time, you're not ready for a committed relationship, because you'll always believe you can do better.

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    • I would sort of accept it, if you're up-front about it, and go dutch on every date.
      But if you expect a guy to pay your dates, you're just playing 2 of them for fools... and well, we have a special term for women like that.

  • Yes its wrong!! Untill and unless those guys know that you're dating other guys too its ok but if they dont know that you are dating other guys then you have no right to lead them on... thats ridiculous!

    i would never date a girl like you!

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  • I've never liked the idea of it but it's hard not to do that. You can't go one person after one person and not spend lots of time. Dating multiple at once is definitely quicker. After a certain amount of dates you should definitely stick to one.

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  • I do it with women, don't see why women shouldn't do the same.

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What Girls Said 15

  • There is nothing wrong with taking your time to get to know them or being selective. Good for you not trying to achieve an instant relationship and knowing what you want.

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  • Theoretically, dating is not really about commitment, it's more about getting yourself out there. I don't see a problem with you going on several dates.

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  • if you let them know your intention is to get to know them as friends while keeping options open i think that would be fine.

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  • If you can handle it when someone gets jealous and finds out you are seeing other guys and not just him.

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  • Nope. That is literally what dating is. There is no commitment yet.

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  • As long as you let them know and aren't leading any of them to believe you like them any more than you actually do you aren't doing anything wrong

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  • It's fine. Unless you've decided to make it official with one of them, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it.

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  • yes of course! this is playing the field which everyone does

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  • It's fine.

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  • Guys do this all the time. There's nothing wrong with this. You should be able to spend time with all of them until you know which one you want.

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  • No I see nothing wrong as Long as you make it known to them all 3 that you are talking to other guys. Dating is not the same as a relationship. Dating is not exclusive

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  • If you're honest with both of them, it's aight.

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  • It's fine, but don't string any of them along. Let it be known you're doing so if someone seems to be getting too attached, especially if later on if you're in a relationship they find out and feel hurt by it.

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  • Eh I guess it's okay.

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  • its totally fine.

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