How do I tell my sister that the guy she is with just wants a sex and make-out buddy?

My sister just turned 19 in March and now she is with a 33 year old guy. My mom and i have tried to tell her that he is just after her because she is so young and gullible. I don't know how to make her understand that all he wants is a make-out and sex buddy. Every time we say anything all we get in response is "whatever" i am lost, i would really appreciate sone help. Thanks.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Even if your instincts are 100% correct about the situation, don't be overly pushy with her about it. All you can do is give her your honest/caring advice, but as soon as it comes across as pushy (her perception of it, even if you're not actually trying to be pushy/judgmental) it's just going to push her in the opposite direction... digging in her heels kinda thing. It's a tough situation that she'll most likely have to learn on her own through experience.

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    • Has the guy told you thats what he's after. Why would you assume thats why he's with her?

    • Ni he hasn't, i assume because all they do when "hang out" is get drunk, make-out, he touches her everywhere and repeatedly asks her for blow jobs

What Guys Said 9

  • tell her to make a GaG account and ask that question. i'll tell her straight. no sugar coating it.

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  • She is young at age 19 , she's adult sorry to say she may have to learn
    out the bad way by experience , you both can tall to your blue in face but
    she has her mind made up ,

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  • Let her get hurt.

    You can't protect everyone all the time.

    She'll figure it out eventually.

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  • You warned her, she has to make her own mistakes and learn from them.

    This might not even be a mistake - for all you know, the guy might be genuine.

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  • She won't believe you. (That's the way sisters are. ;) ...)

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  • Have either of you met him personally? Yes, the age disparity can give pause, but if he is a professional working guy, that would be better than a hoodlum her own age, no?

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    • Sorry, but unless she's ten years ahead of herself maturity-wise, there's only one thing a guy that much older wants from a 19 year old kid.

      Girls that age are naive as fuck. They're easily manipulated and easy to convince to do things that, well, older and/or more confident women probably wont' do.

    • As if a young man her same age doesn't want that one thing too?

      I concur that age issues always give one pause, but for every man who is "robbing the cradle" with a "barely legal", there is a corresponding "barely legal" lady with unresolved "daddy issues". Assuming she is grown and legal, it does take two to tango.

    • Or, for that matter, a manipulative "gold digger" who knows what she is doing.

  • Step 1: Get that freak alone
    2: attempt to seduce him
    3: once he caves (and he will) stop
    4: tell him that you secretly recorded the whole thing
    5: tell him to fuck off or you'll show it to your sister
    6: ?
    7: PROFIT!

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  • Girls and guys have this mindest that older means wiser. In some cases, it's completely false. I have met more mature younger girls then mature older women. It's the sad truth. They're all crazy

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  • There's no point because she'll be all like "but I KNOW him" and "he's not like that". That's what all these girls say when they're seeing older guys who just want someone fresh and naive to fuck, coz older guys have got game!

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What Girls Said 5

  • Its hard to open her eyes, when they're so focused on what she thinks is best for her, unfortunately she may find out the hard way. If she wants to do this with this 33 year old then so be at, at the end of the day it's her choice and her bad decisions. However perhaps she wants some fun and that's it, unless she's talking about dating him etc. Hope she realizes that you guys are just looking out of her and may know a thing or two more than her xx

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    • That's kinda the problem, she is convinced that they are dating when really the are just having make-out sessions

  • Unfortunately, there's not much you can do besides make your opinion known (which you have) and let her make her mistake and learn from it :S

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    • You could try asking her "so what is it that you two actually have in common?" and when she has trouble listing anything then be like "OK, so if you've got very little in common... what else is left that he could possibly be into you for?"

  • I may sound rude, and I'm sorry for this, but let her discover the truth.
    Yes, she will get hurt, but an experience like this would help her in the long run.

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  • You've already told her multiple times so there's not much else you can do. I guarantee you though that she probably already sees the signs, but when you really like someone, you tend to look at things through rosy-colored glasses, allowing you to let certain things slide when they're actually red flags. That's what she's doing. Eventually she will either get hurt or take off those glasses in time to see what's real. Hopefully it's the latter... but a lot of us have been there.

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  • Let her make her own mistake...

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