Is it right to date someone when you still have feelings for someone else?

Is it right to date a guy if you still have feelings for someone else or should you first get over the guy before dating the new guy?


1|0
26|14

Most Helpful Guy

  • How would you feel if you where dating someone all the while they where thinking of some one else? I think the fact you asking this shows what you believe. You should probably tell the guy your dating that you cannot commit to him until you get over the last guy, then he decides whether or not you should continue, it affects him and he should have a say in it.

    9|3
    0|0

What Guys Said 13

  • 1. Love was never meant to be property of the monogamous
    2. But ideally since this is not a question of monogamy but confusion of sorts, it's something you have to sort out within yourself
    3. No harm in dating someone else but letting go is something that one needs to learn - it's an acquired skill :)

    2|0
    1|1
  • No, it's certainly not right. How can you date someone else while you have feelings for someone in particular? that's odd, weird and so that would mean either you are unsure you have feelings for that person or it's possible that your feelings for that person are not strong enough for you to decide anything, hence something is wrong somewhere. It's impossible you can date someone while you have feelings for someone else, at least according to me it holds true.

    1|0
    0|0
  • its only dating, just don't turn it into something more serious if you can't shake off other feelings and focus on the guy you are currently dating.

    0|0
    0|0
    • So the term dating for u means nothing?

    • Show All
    • But if he wants me badly or not that can be good i dont know why he has to blew the person off for that

    • @kitty71 this is when i say people are different, and not everything makes sense.

  • If your feelings mean that you would entertain getting back with your ex , then yet , tell the new guy and go from there.

    You will find that as you get older , you might walk away from someone , it doesn't mean you don't have feelings, or don't care , It all depends if you are also keeping hope of wanting that person back, if its over with the ex, feelings are normal , they will fade , unless you feed them with hope.

    2|0
    0|0
  • No because you're using the person for an ego boost or rebound and it's very shitty to be on the receiving end of it.

    2|0
    0|0
  • So you're still carrying a torch for your ex-boyfriend? No problem. That's a great reason to go out with other people. The best way to get over an old boyfriend is to find a new one you like even better.

    1|0
    0|0
  • No. If you have feelings for someone else, then don't date that person. How would you like it if a guy had feelings for you but was dating someone else or vice versa? Wouldn't you feel cheated? I know I would. That's why I don't date someone I don't have feelings for.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Better probably to get over one before moving on but stranger things have happened. I have a couple of times had an overlap and it didn't affect me too much

    1|0
    0|0
  • I will say ITS WRONG, you may ask me why? because the moment the other becomes available you will him. dont waste his time if you dont have feeling for him

    0|0
    0|0
  • deal with your feelings, confront him and be honest

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yeah you need to let go of the person you still have feelings for before you date someone else. You should only date a person because *they* are the one you have feelings for and want love from.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It doesn't feel right for me, because I can't concentrate and focus if there's someone else on my mind. Everything becomes framed in that other person's perspective: Is she as good as the other girl? This feeling is familiar... I had it with that other girl? Maybe I should be more cautious or play hard to get, since whatever I did didn't work with the other girl the first time round? Maybe I should consider if I should commit... maybe the other girl might come back?

    If you are not considering anything long-term for this relationship, and the guy also has the same intention, then I think there's no problem. Otherwise, it's not fair I think.

    1|0
    0|0
  • When dating, you're putting yourself on the market for the emotionally available, which you're clearly not.
    You're wasting not only your own time, but also the time of your dates, which I find disrespectful.

    You shouldn't date until you're ready for a commitment.

    3|3
    0|0

What Girls Said 26

  • It makes things more complicated, and you might unwittingly end up hurting the guy you are dating, but on the other hand it could help you get over those feelings being with someone else.

    No, it's not wrong. But be careful not to hurt someone else or yourself.

    1|0
    0|0
  • To be honest, It can either go two ways. For instance, in my current relationship I used my man to get over someone else-and believe me I know how bad that sounds but the thing is, I still haven't gotten over my very first relationship and while I moved on from that rel

    0|0
    0|0
  • I honestly don't know how people can do it. I couldn't date anyone if I still had feelings for my ex, I can't picture myself with anyone else and unless I was able to get completely over my ex it would never work with someone else. It wouldn't be fair to the other person or for yourself.

    2|0
    0|0
  • No, the best thing would be to allow yourself time to get over the last guy. There are certain circumstances that I would say otherwise. For instance, if you were married for a very long time and your spouse passed away. You will likely always love that person. That does not mean that you should be single and alone forever, though. You should still give yourself plenty of time to let your emotions settle. That person may be dead, but a love like that never dies you just have to make room in your heart for a new love.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Why don't people just follow The Golden Rule? It's so simple:
    -One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself (directive form).
    -One should not treat others in ways that one would not like to be treated (cautionary form, also known as theSilver Rule).

    Nobody wants to date someone who still had feelings for someone else. Come on!

    Totally agree with @hellionthesage

    1|1
    0|0
  • No, it's not. You're deceiving yourself and the guy you're dating. So, it's better to forget the other guy before dating another person.
    Then, it will be fair for both.

    1|1
    0|0
  • I always thought you should give yourself time to heal by yourself, but sometimes you never heal from having feeling to someone and when you date someone else they might make you realize that those emotions were just a passing or how better deserving you are or they might teach you to let go..

    1|0
    0|0
  • It is not right I think. And it is bad also for you and the one you are dating too. You are harming yourself and him too.
    Giving useless hopes and consuming your time.

    0|0
    0|0
  • you should wait till you are ready.. it is not fair to the new guy

    0|0
    0|0
  • I wouldn't recommend it no.. You might end up hurting the other person.
    I wrote a mytake about breakups, and mentioned this in it too

    0|0
    0|0
  • Literally happened to me. This guy was into me but he started dating someone else. Truth is he could have dated me because I was interested but now Im over it because I found out he used her to get me jealous.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Do you have more feelings for the person with you now then the one you had in the past? But logically it isn't right. So I'd try to get past it. And make sure your not just dating that person as a rebound.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Not right for me. If you love another person, you mustn't play with the emotions of person you are with..

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, make sure these are real feelings and you're not just bored with your relationship and that this other person also feels the same way.

    0|0
    0|0
  • There's nothing wrong with dating someone while liking another person. If you feel this person can make you happy then it should be no problem getting over the other person.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I think so, yes.

    0|0
    0|0
  • no its really unfair to the other person
    im still not over my first love hence why i have no itnerest in dating, i dont want to hurt someonelese

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's not right I think. It would not work.

    1|0
    0|0
  • No because all you'll do is think about the guy and not the guy your dating

    0|0
    0|0
  • Another question where the answer is so obvious.. seriously makes me wonder if people even read what they write before posting sometimes.

    It is WRONG to be in a relationship or dating someone when you know have feelings for someone else. Its not fair to that person, at all! Cheating is cheating unless the other person knows you are 'playing the field'.

    Just don't do it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Depends on what you mean by dating.

    If you guys are literally just occasionally going on dates and it isn't anywhere near serious yet then I think its ok, but if it is anything more than that its unfair to him.

    0|0
    0|0
  • i call it a" betrayal " not only for him but also for yourself , how could you say i love you for someone you don't love it is a shame.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I'd advice you the second for your own sake.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Personally, i believe you should wait until your heart heals. It is unfair to you and your new boyfriend if you enter into a relationship. You end up bringing all of your insecurities and pain from your last relationship into the new one.

    You can't fly with a broken wing, and you can't love with a broken heart. After a breakup people go through a healing process and they have a lot of raw emotions going on inside them

    . After a person heals they regain their strength.. so when they are ready to love again they can put all of their love, effort and emotions into the new relationship instead of trying to love again while they are trying to heal.

    In order to be happy and make a new guy happy... you first need to deal with and accept the painful past

    0|0
    0|0
  • No that would just make you think and want you get back with that person more. Make sure you get over the person you had feelings for first before you start dating new people.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I did that and I ended up feeling sadder than I was before

    1|1
    0|0
Loading...