Is it okay to date a missionary if I don't think I'll be one?

A girl and I have been talking for a while now, and we recently started going a few dates here and there. we've spent significant time together, but she wants to be a missionary to Africa, and I really struggle with the concept. We are crazy about each other, but should we keep it going?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Normally, I would say "no", don't continue w/the relationships if you have different goals. BUT...you are both so young still. She may change her mind...esp if she falls in love. I guess you just need to make sure she knows that is NOT in your plans. She will have to decide whether being a missionary is her calling or not and whether she can give that up for someone. The only issue would be that you wouldn't want her to regret it if she doesn't become one (later on in life). I think open communication about it is key. Good Luck!

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What Girls Said 1

  • Yes it's fine, but you need to realize that religion is a huge part of her life and if you 2 are going to be able to make it work, you're going to have to accept that as part of who she is

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What Guys Said 2

  • If you have similar beliefs, then it will probably be easier is some aspects.

    If you can handle long periods where she is gone (without cheating), and in sometimes dangerous situations/places, and she can handle it (without cheating), then give it a try, just be aware that this could be a possibility.

    If you also earn a decent income or have a job that will sustain you, then it will be easier.

    While I'm a christian, I never was interested in missions work - that is, going to dangerous third world countries and taking care of (usually) medical stuff. And some people always tried to make me feel kind of weird about it. But then I went to a conference for Christians. A motorcycle gang minister told a group of us that sometimes missions work doesn't have to be third world country living in a hut type of work. It can be the inner city. It can be the neighborhood. It can be anywhere. And that it can be just as important as the so called "real" mission work.

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  • Of course it's okay to date her. Breaking up before the relationship gets things backwards.

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