Dating someone with a fear of abandonment?

Tell-tale signs/words/behavior? How can you help them help themselves?

What are your experiences?


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What Guys Said 1

  • I have this a bit, i use to fuck around to share my eggs.. or semen in this case, in different baskets/vaginas. He just needs to know if you did leave him that he wouldn't have to be alone, needs to feel wanted by other women. Or maybe its just my character flaw :)

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    • Right.. or the "I'll cheat on you before you cheat on me" thing. I have abandonment issues myself, but I'm the opposite of that. And I don't really get that vibe from him

    • Exactly.. cheat just in case she does. What do you think it is then? Parental/ex girlfriend issues?

What Girls Said 1

  • I'm currently dating someone with this fear. We've been together almost a year. He tells me "please don't leave me" (usually crying) whenever I get upset with him. I always tell him "no babe I'm not leaving you, I never have any intention of leaving you" and hug him. I think it's a sign that they are a bit insecure, but do love you deeply. He also tells me that I'm the most important person to him, the reason he keeps going, and that he would give up anything for me. I haven't been able to completely shake him of his fear, but I do try to reassure him and it helps. I say "I can't wait until we're married and we live together" for example 😊

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    • I feel like if I talked about marriage after only two months of dating he wouldn't feel reassured ;)

      I'm not good with verbal affirmation, is the problem. But I know he needs it... I tend to show affection with my actions in subtle ways

    • My ex was weird- I rarely get angry, but the one time he did something that really hurt my feelings I started crying and he freaked out, burst into tears and couldn't stop apologizing. That was just him being manipulative though... he didn't actually do anything to change the behavior. He were dating for 3 years and he always talked about how I was too good for him and how I could do better and whatnot... honestly it started to irritate me after a while because I was the only one putting effort into the relationship in the first place.

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