Is there a way to switch off one's romantic/sexual desires?

I want mine turned off. I was not deisgned for dating. It's not my thing and I don't want to deal with the complications it may pose. This is pretty much the only thing that wrecks my happiness. If it weren't for the existence of dating, sex, and romantic relationships and this desire, I would be completely happy.

An analogy is, say you're bad at baseball AND you hate it. In that case, the solution is to just not play baseball. There's nothing wrong with choosing not to do certain hobbies that you a) hate and/or b) are not good at.

The problem is, one can't actually do the same with dating because of this intense romantic/sexual desire, so intense that choosing to resign like this is actually the worse option. In other words, I really do NOT want to date or deal with the complications dating and the participation in romantic relationships will pose.

I've pretty much never dated and been unwanted by girls my whole life, but I know what's in store because of the abundant amount of time I naturally spent on the internet the past few yeras, and have seen how brutal this dating game can be. Very dangerous.

What makes it worse, is the sheer amount of expectations people have, just makes it even more difficult for someone actively dating to maintain a healthy self-esteem. There exist so many "red flags" and reasons to get dumped over.

So one has a choice: either endure these harsh brutalities or resign to having unfulfilled romantic/sexual desires.

Unfortunately, because the romantic/sexual desires are so strong, the first choice actually ends up being slightly better. Another factor contributing to this evaulation is the fact that we are conditioned to put great value on relationships and sex and have become central to society, so not partaking in it, makes it feel as if one is missing out on a huge part of life...<br /

Updates:
In my Take here, I describe these brutalities to a reasonable depth and also explain that I have even done quite in the past in terms of attempts to date: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a21684-respect-the-brutalities-of-dating

I tried talking to girls, initiated conversations, asked girls out, tried online dating (swiping at least 75% girls to the right), and still got absolutely NO RESULTS, not even a female friend. Moreover, as my Take discusses, even after that basic level, there are many other complications and brutalities to consider.
Bump.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Just find a life's purpose and work at it like nobody has ever worked on it before. Some of The greatest men in history were anything but good with women. You can accomplish so much more while not chasing girls. Just take a hard think of who you want to be and do it because you want to be the best at it (don't do it for anyone else, including girls) and know that while the majority of people are living a soap opera, you are sharpening your skills and knowledge.

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    • Exactly, this is what I want to do and am doing to an extent. As I said, if it weren't for this dating thing, I would be quite happy with my life. I am doing fine otherwise. I love tournament chess and actually that's done a pretty good job of making not dating (again, not even by choice, but because I am unwanted by girls) somewhat bearable.

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