Why are men so scared of pretty women, even if theyre super nice?


im not talking about the b*tchy mean ones- guys are usually mean to really nice women who are hot, and
they act liek slaves to the mean ones. Why are guys like this- backwards and rude and why dont they
treat the nice women nicely, and treat the mean ones like crap? they're scared of even the nice ones and act like
jerks to them


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well I was nice to everyone. Hot or ugly. I never assume a girl (hot or not) is into me ever. So I am always in friendship mode always. It's helped me immensely in business as I have worked with high power women without any relationship issues, and remained professional all the time. I have felt a bit intimidated though when a hot girl has asked me for help because she had tons of guys to ask and she asks me. I understand friendship zone means she shares her problems with you, but it's still weird for me.

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    • oh ok- im in friendship mode too- but i guess the guy is more intimidated or scared since im the female- i dont know what guys think they seem weird. It's weird that u say u were intimidated by a girl because she asked 'you' for help... it's interesting how guys think- they might think "why is she picking me over all these guys she could have"... the reality is, she just maybe thought u were better or knew more...

    • What makes it weird, and this happens with everyone, is when a person who has dating problems, complains or asks for help, from the person who usually cannot get dates. The fat friend, the friendshipzone guy, the priest at church lol. It sometimes bugs me because I know you getting support and a trusted friend to unload on, but seriously? Why me... like I only know how to NOT get women or solve dating problems. If I did, I wouldn't be in the friendzone now would I?

Most Helpful Girl

  • It's a mix of "OMG she's so hot I want to be with her" and "she's probably not going to be into me though" "she's probably a bitch" "I don't want to make a fool of myself I front of a pretty girl because then she REALLY won't want to be with me" "I don't want to seem like I'm trying to get her attention" "she probably has guys crawling over her all the time, I want to seem different but don't know how"

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What Guys Said 24

  • The more you want something, the more "scared" you are because you fear you're gonna fuck everything up. Just like with job interviews, you're more scared to go to an interview of a dream job, than of a regular waiter/waitress job.
    If a guy acts like you said (which is not all of us), basically he acts mean because it's like a defense mechanism, he wants to show like he doesn't care too much so that he doesn't look weak. He acts nice to a mean girl because he doesn't care if she doesn't get her, he just wants her for one night, that's it.

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    • yeah I think that's true--like if you want something or sex so bad you're just that much more scared of rejection, so you try not to go for it b/c it scares you too much... oh yeah that makes sense too--like, he acts as if he doesn't care b/c he deosnt want to look weak... that makes so much sense- but why does he just want to 'use her for one thing' then if he wants her so bad?

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    • @AleDeEurope could you give me some examples? like what are some clear cut signs related to body language lol

    • @MissBex95 Looking you in the eyes when YOU are talking. Feet pointing at you. Is not too fidgety, like you don't have the feeling that he wants to leave. If he leans forward, or doesn't lean back if you lean forward. Touching you. Also being in an "open" position, like not having his arms crossed or in his pocket.

  • It's a misconception to put this entirely on the guys.

    The mean girls only stick with guys that they can control.

    The nice girls are looking for a partner but can't tell "confidence" from "cockiness". It takes a certain amount of confidence or cockiness to approach a hot girl. Jerks are cocky.

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    • that's true... but they can- the problem is just like the mean girls, the jerk guys try to find nice women they can abuse or control

  • Fear of rejection is that paralyzing!

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  • There's obviously something more going on beyond "niceness" and "meanness" then.

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  • I agree with the paralyzing fear thing ( depending on the guy ) Women tend to chase what they can't have. There are men who capitalize on this. It's also possible someones trying to create an aura of greatness about ones self. If a man turns down an amazing woman people wonder how much more amazing he must be if a woman like that doesn't cut it. Other women may grow very curious. Or perhaps it's simple and sadder. You've said you were hot, you've said you were really nice, what do other people think about you? Are you as nice as you think you are, does he think so?

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    • i was the asked of this question previously- and yes i am really nice.. probably too nice b/c im totally not mean or rude and never act like a b*tch... im more the kind of person who says "sorry" for little things.. kind of like Canadians... but men are probably just intimidated or stupid.. who knows

    • @ashley9929 Of course, all men must be stupid rather than the possibility than you not being nice. I'm not saying that you're not nice, you might be really lovely in person but you are coming off slightly not nice from what you're saying...

    • @ashley9929 There's one more possibility that comes to mind I failed to mention. Really attractive women tend to be sought after by just about all men and even some women. Often in our society, these women quickly grow tired of the nice, kind polite guys. After so many of these types you tend to look towards the bad boy type. These types are often in it for the sex and the sex only. They are not keepers, and no you can't change them get over it. In response to this behavior the nice guys learn to treat you badly because treating you nicely just doesn't seem to be working for them anymore.

  • This same question should be asked to girls too. But the answer's pretty simple. Insecurities make people act like dogs. That's all :)

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  • your hanging around the wrong guys, were not all like that, all bitchy girls are ugly to me

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  • Actually, I hate girls/ women who are mean ones or who have ulterior motive like getting me to do their assignment or being over smart by not returning the favor when ask for help with work which I usually don't ask anyway to not owe them.

    I am not scared of pretty woman. I just think of the following one reason not to talk to them.
    1. Fear of rejection
    2. Most are really shy
    3. I respect them and I don't want to hurt them by asking them out of the blue.
    4. Will it be alright if the average girl/women becomes hostile to the pretty girl after I talk to her nicely. They will think I am a superficial person with no moral. So to avoid such behavior I avoid talking to them altogether. And I don't look at them in the eye. And in my culture gazing the opposite gender and even elders is inappropriate contrary to the U. S notion.

    5. Would you do the same if I treat you nicely which I try to do with woman?

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  • It's a "too good to be true" scenario for all but the most conceited guys. I simply wouldn't think it's possible for such a "perfect" woman to be attracted to me, so I'd assume there is something seriously wrong with that situation. I guess it's similar to how some women always end up dating assholes because of their low self-esteem.

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  • im not scared of a pretty women.

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  • Acting like a jerk is a way to show interest without investing your emotions. It keeps a guy from not having to nurse his ego if he's rejected, subtly or brash.

    This might be more common when guys are dealing with pretty women, because they are more universally desired. Meaning, there's more competition, which equates to less of a chance for him.

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  • Too many bad relationships it happens to both sexes

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  • Lol I'm not lol I work with about 3-4 of them and train along several.

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  • Fear of rejection is a mother*******. Pretty women are intimidating even if they're nice. I'm married to a pretty woman and even I get intimidated by her sometimes.

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    • but why are they intimidating? what are you scared or shy of?

    • Some beautiful women have treated men badly. So, most guys limit their contact with them.

    • @ashley9929 Well Ashley that's a simple one to answer. COMPETITION! Not just the competition but the fact that you have potentially millions of other dating options. Have you ever dated an attractive, strong, powerful, successful man, and due to his attractiveness and other qualities felt you might be in danger of being cheated on or replaced simply due to the ease in which someone with those qualities can do so?
      Perhaps you've even been attracted to a man you simply feel is out of your league and that you may lack the qualities this amazing person must want in a relationship.

  • Could be damage from the "beautiful people" treating him like shit most of his life, or outright cruel rejections from those pretty women, could stem from a belief he's not worth her or she's too good for him. Could be a lot of things.

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  • a nice pretty women are just rare species , it's hard to believe if they are for real once you meet them, there are lot of pretenders out there

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  • Some men have no confidence.

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  • I don't treat beautiful girls meanly but rather coldly. in the beginning to show that to me they're just a person and I'm not so head over heels for theyre beauty. Trust me I've done this to beautiful girls at my work, classes, etc. After they realize that I'm like every other guy, then I'm nice to them and were usually real good buddies. I don't know why. But to me it seems if the girls seems like they need to "be careful" of what they do Cruz they think I can be mean to them and once I become nice it completely bypasses the *oh he just wants to sleep with me* mind set

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  • They don't want to be accused of being thirsty or jumping on the band wagon because he thinks that she already has enough male attention

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  • He's a beta

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  • I don't know what kind of men you know, but I for one never really pay any attention to stick up bitches who act like everything in the world is their right. And any girl that treats me fairly, I'm an extraordinary gentleman to, and treat them very nicely.

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  • There are hot women who are nice?
    I have yet to meet a 'hot' woman who treats any man nice. Normally they give everyone a dirty look or look like they think they're better than everyone else. In the rare instance you see them smile, it's because they are talking to some guy who looks like he walked out of GQ. 'Hot' women usually know they are, and flaunt it and act like total snobs.

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    • not true--plenty of hot women who are nice

  • Have you encountered any psychopaths?

    Just curious.

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  • Pretty women usually know all too well they're pretty: everyone told them that, from preschool. It doesn't do much good for their personality.
    Pretty women usually have a guy. Or they have a number lined up, waiting.
    Conclusion: they spell t-r-o-u-b-l-e.
    I'll pass my way.

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    • thats not true at all... there are lots of lonely pretty women who never get asked out.. wtf

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    • well, thats the problem- men are always looking for 'signals' in some stupid way... which is a myth and farce clueless men teach to each other on how to deal with and approach women. The truth is, many women are scared and intimidated too of rejection, and give men that 'nasty vibe' for other reasons... I do it because I've been rejected by so many men and mistreated that, I do it to say "f*ck off i know you're going to screw me over" because about 99.9% of men have... and i dont think any ones sort of glancing at me will be any different. In reality, I'd love to talk to those guys, but THEYRE the ones rejecting me. Men reject me all the time despite that im really pretty and super nice. Men laugh at me, mock me and reject me. They treat me as if, you think I"D DATE YOU? or "you think you have a chance with me"? men treat me like im inferior... I should easily have modeled in playboy... So now it's an "i can reject YOU before you torment me" because he probably will.

    • I think it's time you began to act like a modern woman and take things into your own hands. Why sit around waiting for another 50,000 psychopaths to try and pick you up. Find that nice guy who's nervous of the pretty girl and ask him out yourself!

What Girls Said 4

  • Afraid of rejection, low confidence, shy, scared etc could be any reason really.

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  • Im not pretty but guys are afraid of me😐

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  • Guess you're pissed that they're afraid of you, yes? Men like women with character not just nice and sweet fluffy girls, if you're pretty you need to have a chatacter, it's nothing when you just look nice and cute.

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  • Looks intimidate people. Pretty girls even intimidate me and I am a girl!

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