To stay or not to stay: a college freshman's dilemma. Should I pursue my total freedom?

What do you do when you're faced with an older, more-spark-less-than-not, relationship? Over a year long online relationship that you're afraid it's time to let go of? A person that you inarguably care deeply for, but only view as a dear friend at times? What about when your life takes a complete rotation within the course of a week, one unrecognizable to anyone who knew you before, but outrageously exciting? Then you start to notice the sharp divide that has formed between your Old Life and New. Almost everyone you knew before here? They don't belong in your New Life. The lines are tough to blur and, in some instances, you don't want to try to blur the line because you've fallen in love with this new environment and the freedom it offers. It's a freedom that you've craved for years and finally have! It's exhilarating! And, in the midst of it all, the new people, the new food, the new home, you meet a new person. He's charming. And sweet. And a hell of a lot more like you than so many other people you've met. And he shows interest. And you think it might work. You feel that you can hold the most random yet intelligent conversations with this person, that, when you ask him his opinion on Trump for president, he doesn't just say he's an asshole, but he goes on to explain the things that make him one and the direction things may potentially turn. You've never met someone so similar, so adventurous. No one has ever showed this sort of interest in you before! Maybe this specific one isn't the one, but... But then you think of the Old Life and the relationship. You think of how it can't progress for at least four years (or more!) due to distance and commitment to education. You can't stand the thought of hurting someone so dear to you, but everywhere you turn would be pain. Staying in it would limit you both. And you'd be living a lie. But letting him go would break his heart. You can't stand to hurt someone who you've grown to consider to be a best friend. Help?

  • Stay with the old relationship.
    33% (1)20% (1)25% (2)Vote
  • Pursue new relationships.
    33% (1)60% (3)50% (4)Vote
  • Avoid all relationships new and old.
    0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
  • Other. (Elaborate below, please?)
    34% (1)20% (1)25% (2)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • "You can't stand the thought of hurting someone so dear to you, but everywhere you turn would be pain. Staying in it would limit you both. And you'd be living a lie."

    Sounds to me like you already know what you need to do. Don't worry about how much it will hurt him. He's a big boy; he'll survive and move on.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Lawl, fuck online-only relationships.

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What Girls Said 1

  • take a break from it or try new adventures to help create the spark again

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