How long to wait before having sex?

I'm on OKCupid and I go out with a lot of guys. Sometimes I really like a guy but I feel that since I wait too long to have sex they end things. If I have sex with a guy right away I know it's not going to lead to anything serious.

After how many dates can I have sex with a guy without him thinking I'm a slut.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Have sex when you feel comfortable... there are no rules. You may want to wait or you may be overcome with lust and do him first night.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If a guy ends things only because you waited too long to have sex with him then he was only after sex. I would recommend never having sex on the first 5 dates. When you feel comfortable enough with him and when you think that your relationship is actually going somewhere and that there's a connection beyond anything physical that is an indicator that it would be okay to have sex with him. Even if it occurs before the first 5 dates I would still not recommend having sex with him unless you've known him for a long time before dating him.

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What Guys Said 3

  • My girlfriend and I waited 11 months before we did so. It something that happens when it happens. Any guy who cares and likes you for more than your body will appreciate that. In my own opinion I prefer a woman who is willing to show me more about them as a person first and foremost and then explore the physical side later.

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  • There's no hard and fast rule as to when you should have sex while you're out and about dating people! If you happen to meet someone of the opposite sex and there's plenty of sexual chemistry and tension then go with what feels right for you :-)

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  • until marriage

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What Girls Said 3

  • I have figured out that this depends entirely on what the guy wants to begin with. If all he is after is a hook up, he will leave if he doesn't get it or will leave as soon as he does. If he wants more, he will stick around if he sees something in you he likes.

    The object for women is to figure out what they, personally, are comfortable with. If you can hook up and never think twice about it, more power to you. If you will tend to feel used and fixated on the guy after a hook up, then a hook up isn't for you.

    If you hold off on sex for at least a few dates, you will get a much better feel for what he wants. It is a gamble either way, but I personally prefer to wait a couple of weeks to avoid feeling used and thrown away. That's just me, though.

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  • how about after he puts a ring on your finger?

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  • That's an age old question.. I feel 4 is good..
    But you have to feel comfortable about the timing

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