Taking things slow with a girl, how to proceed?

This girl I've been seeing is wanting to take things slow. I thought I messed up in the beginning by being a bit too pushy with her and she said she wanted to be friends. This is after we were a bit physical on some of our dates but we never went as far as having sex. I told her to contact me if she changed her mind.

A couple months later, she contacts me. We met up again and we got on like we were never apart. She invited me over to her house a week later to watch a movie and drink. We made out but nothing more. I think we were both confused about what it was but we both liked it. We have been seeing each other pretty regularly since then. I do like her a lot and I feel like there's some serious potential with her. I do have other options and I'm not trying to put all my eggs in one basket with her though.

Finally, she asks me to be honest about how everything is with us. I told her how I felt about her. I enjoy what we have and I enjoy being around her and doing things with her. She told me she's not sure what she wants and has been focusing on herself. She also told me that I make her feel really good and comfortable and doesn't want to stop being around me. I can tell she's telling the truth because she has been stressed out with work and hasn't had time to figure things out for herself. I thought we should continue having fun with each other right now with no pressure for anything else. To just take things one step at a time. She seemed to agree with this and was on the same page with me.

My initial thought is she is interested in me more than just a friend as I told her to be honest with me and to let me know if that's all she wants. I think she's still trying to figure things out for herself. I want to be the gentleman by giving her time to figure this out and respect to her wishes.

My question is how slow should I go? Should I attempt to kiss her or just continue being friendly with her? I don't want to pressure her or be too pushy with her, but I also don't want to keep waiting around for her to make a decision. I feel a girl will take forever to figure this out. I don't want to give her an ultimatium either. Does anyone have any advice or a time when something similar happened to them? Has it ever worked out?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Some women prefer that you ask before kissing, and it's generally the better thing to do. It's kind of standard to give a first kiss on the first date, right? Just ask her.