Too early to want kids?

Well I'm 23 dating this guy Whos 32... He wants kids I do too but thing is we just let in August.. He lives with roommates and works at Walmart.. I live with my mom and work as a physical therapist... He has been telling me he wants me to have kids with him.. asap.. I feel as though.. He's not ready financially... Neither am I.. we aren't married and we dont live together.. I want us to enjoy each other first then add a kid later down the road... Could I be being picky or is my thinking logical.. We haven't even been together a full year... Let alone 6 months. Could he just be using me as a baby machine... He doesn't talk about us getting married... everything seems so backwards...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • "is my thinking logical"
    I think your thinking is logical. Be careful though, ask yourself if those are the real reasons. Also ask yourself what would be the conditions with which you would be ready to have a baby and ask yourself whether or not those conditions are realist. Like do you need him to be CEO of Microsoft and you being the personal therapist of a famous basketball player before you will even consider having a baby? Maybe you are aiming too high and will never reach those goals. My mother was 22 when she had me and I always had everything I needed. You are 24. You don't have to have a baby now, but it would be a good time to start thinking about what you would need to say "yes, I am ready". If you keep saying yes, one day I would like to be a mother, it will always stay a thing of the future even after you reached menopause.

    "Could he just be using me as a baby machine"
    That I highly doubt. I don't think we work that way. I sure don't.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It sounds like he's a point in his life where he feels like if he doesn't get something done now it's never gonna happen. You're young & fruitful, women his age have their clocks ticking and he himself probably feels like he's getting old. If he's 32 working at Walmart and living with a room mate it doesn't seem like he's had much ambition in his own life. Please don't have a child with someone with you don't know and especially since neither of you are financially able. Just the fact that he would be pressuring you knowing your situation and lack of a relationship shows his desperation. In fact he's so desperate he's being completely irresponsible and selfish. He's not thinking about the child's well being he's thinking about having himself a progeny. I think you need to watch this one from a distance.

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What Guys Said 8

  • RED FLAG, RED FLAG!

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  • Damn that's a bit clingy! Read him closely and judge your gut.

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  • He needs to respect you.
    Some guys may have the tendecy to get her girl pregnant, so he can "arrest" you to him. LIike a wayto not lt you get out of his life...

    But that does not mean it's your case.

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  • You have known this guy for a month and already kids on the menu? Mkmm... no.. back off.

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  • wait a few years down the road

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  • He needs to get his shit together first. He's moving way too fast

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  • Don't have kids if you can't afford them

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  • You're quite right; everything is totally backwards. Get your lives where they need to be, give the relationship more time to grow and develop, get married if that's your preference, and THEN talk about the possibility of having kids. Not the other way around.

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What Girls Said 0

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