Do you overthink often? Particularly about the opposite sex?

Im mostly interested to see if guys do as much as girls.
I tend to overthink when I like a guy and get really ahead of myself. Drives me crazy and it always seems silly after

  • Yes
    72% (33)66% (44)68% (77)Vote
  • No
    11% (5)13% (9)12% (14)Vote
  • Sometimes/Not often
    13% (6)19% (13)17% (19)Vote
  • Other/comment
    4% (2)2% (1)3% (3)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • We tend to overthink, because we're afraid of being hurt. We've most likely been hurt in the past and don't want to go through it again, so, we start to overthink the simplest things that are right in front of us, so that we avoid it. Question is, how to get over that fear? The best way to do that is to just face it. The only way to get over a fear is to face it.

    Were you a cheerleader? I know, weird question but, you look like you could have been one in high school and or college or pro. I'da asked you it in private messages but, you profile is private so I can't unless we follow each other, so, thought I would just ask it

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes and it's a very bad habit

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What Guys Said 26

  • Yeah, because I'm highly insecure myself, and don't really believe that any woman on earth would actually be interested in me.

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  • Everyone has a mask on in society.

    How they think they have to react to situations.
    How they actually feel about situations etc.

    With this in mind it can be maddening to know how to talk to a girl especially if you are, for lack of a better phrase, hit on her.
    Do you use a cheesy pick up line? If you do she might not like it, or she might like it but feel like society expects her to not like it. Do you play the strong and silent type? If you do she might not notice you at all, or you might come across as creepy.

    Best case scenario you aren't in a bar but a more natural setting like in a group of friends or in class/work and can become friendly acquaintances first. After you get to know each other a little then it is less difficult to know what the other person might like or not like or if you should ask them out.

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  • No I try and take things in stride or at face value. I feel like overthinking a situation or action is a waste of time and just brings more confusion to the situation... I'll just go with my first/gut instinct.

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  • Some studies show that the more free time we have on our hands, he more we tend to over think things. I guess the solution to overthinking is to stay busy. Now, if you are too busy, do you under think things? dc:

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  • Sometimes it happens not all the time. i guess if i met a girl who i was interested in and she was interested in me it would happen.

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  • I have a feeling that my definition of over thinking is much smaller then your definition of over thinking.

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  • used to. no more pedestal for me though. if anything i always doubt women very heavily, its usually pretty accurate.

    always expect they're full of themselves, always expect they overestimate their bodies, always expect that their other personality traits are limited and occluded by their ideas about sex. always expect that sex with them will not be nearly as great as they and other guys think it will. and if you are pleasantly surprised, you are pleasantly surprised

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  • All the time, unfortunately :(

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  • No follow on instinct.

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  • i have lost countless hours of sleep thinking about a girl. what we have done, what we might eventually do. things that would drive you crazy. i guess i might be crazy, huh. lol

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  • yeah. basically as soon as i´m interested, i start overthinking.

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  • Yes. If I like a girl, I will invent 101 reasons why she wouldn't want to date me. It sucks.

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  • The human brain has evolved to deal with complex stuff like Relativity and quantum mechanics. It's a pity we can't dumb it down when we want to think about simple things like girls.

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  • Sometimes. Definitely not as much as the women I've dated. I remember one girl I dated who was 5 years older than me and we went to a movie and she told me she didn't remember a thing from the whole movie because she was too nervous.

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    • What does being nervous have to do with thinking? A person can be nervous before they are even aware of a single thought... Nerves a re impulse not cognition.

    • @Azara I forgot to mention that she was nervous thinking about dating someone younger than herself for the first time in her life.

  • I always think that I'm 100% not attractive and when the opposite sex sees me they automatically think I'm unattractive as well. I tend to overthink then that destroys all of my confidence.

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  • Yes all the time.
    That is why I'm here.

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  • i am over-fantasizing about her ; p

    i guess people tend to be more overthinking as they grow older

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  • Yes very much if I like the girl very much

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  • Eh, after the first time, I barely overthink it.
    But it does hit the mind bloody hard...

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  • Story of my life.

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  • I overthink things way too often, pretty much scared myself out of most things sexually.

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  • First let me just say your smokin hot second yes sometimes

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  • I overthink sometimes, fear.
    Makes me be awkward to the oppsite gender

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  • I think I am in love at first sight when I looked at you're photo and all that wholesome pizza.

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  • I vote C.

    filler

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What Girls Said 11

  • I overthink when I panic because I realize how much I care about the guy. That's when I start thinking about things, especially if it's a guy who doesn't live in the same area as me. It doesn't help I'm a jealous person about things sometimes, especially being paired with some insecurities.

    There's a small list of things that goes through my head when I'm feeling particularly insecure in general:

    - He found someone else
    - I'm boring, there are probably at least 5 other girls he talks to he's more interested in
    - I'm not the only one he says these things to, I'm not special
    - I'm not the only one who calls him this, it's not special to him like it is to me
    - He's not talking much, he'd clearly rather spend his time doing other things / talking to someone else than talk to me
    - I'm not enough. I don't do it for him anymore.

    Depending on the nature of the relationship with the guy, I'll voice some if not most or all of these insecurities. But even after he's reassured me that I am enough or that I DO do it for him, I still have small lingering thoughts of inadequacy.

    Usually the insecurities only pop up when enduring long bouts of silence between decent conversations with a guy, though.

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  • What do you mean exactly by over think and ahead of yourself... Could you give an example? Thanks:)

    I think through things thouroughly- when warranted as in complex situations or unfamiliar circumstance or circumstance when there's an ethical conflict- bc I like to be prepared to handle unexpected unexpected Situations or being unsure as to what course of action to take or decions to make. But I don't see it as I rethinking I see it as being methodical and reasonable. Prefer that to jumping to conclusions getting carried away and shoving my head up my ass lol ;)

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    • Hmm... Everyone seems to use the term thinking too much -- I'm still not sure why you guys mean. Why is anyone afraid of thinking if that's what you're doing. I don't think it's thinkimg but fear that you're referring to. everyone who says they think too much take abiit what they are worrying abiit. Worry can exist without purposeful thinking. Worry can carry thoughts but you dint create worry by thinking rather yiur thinkimg alerts you to it.

      Maybe instead of worrying a bit worrying it's best to just accept you're worries me comfint it head on instead of trying to push it under the way. It will just pop up again later.

      I think for this reason too it's best to peruse people you're interested rather than waiting to be persued.. . The more control a person can exert over their life the less scary it will seem.

    • People also worry in place of communicating. If people just honestly talked to each other instead of jumping to conclusions there would be much less anxiety.

  • I do sometimes and I hate it. It can create problems in relationships that weren't even there in the first place :/

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  • Yeah... I end up sitting there thinking about stuff that'll probably never happen. It's really upsetting stuff.

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  • I overthink about everything! I drive my own self insane with the way I overthink everything. From small unimportant stuff to major stuff. It's crazy.

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  • Yeah. I overthink about what my crush said, what did it mean, why his friend told me this, why he looked at me etc etc

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  • I only tend to over think things when I really, really like a guy. And that is pretty rare for me since it's hard to get me really hooked on a person.. but yeah, when I do, I scrutinise everything!

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  • I over think in general and make everything worse than it seems. Me + relationship= worry/doubts/fears.

    It's a disaster.

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  • I like to go for the simplest possible explanation always. IF the guy does something completely random, I will just call it completely random. No need to try and decode what he really feels.

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  • Vote A = Im a stereotypical virgo who overthinks absolutely EVERYTHING 24/7/365.

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    • The 365 wasn't necessary because days have already been covered. 24 is basically a day, for 7 times each week which is basically 'all the time' already.

      Maybe if you said 24/7/12.

      Then you won't get the 29th of Feb off ;)

    • QooLipBite (laughing) ... semantics!!!
      Peace dude xo

  • I always do

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