When I started college I wasn't in very good shape. I wasn't really fat, but I wasn't fit either, I was what I've heard called "skinny-fat." I had very little muscle from being inactive during my high school years and I was flabby from eating an unhealthy diet. Since then, I've totally changed my lifestyle and my body. I started lifting weights as part of a campus program and have gained 40 pounds of muscle. Most importantly, I've changed my body composition from being 210 pounds with over 30% bodyfat to 190 lbs with about 8% bodyfat. My upper body isn't huge, but I actually have muscle definition now and look like a man rather than a little kid.
When I was a freshman, I fell for this girl in my dorm. She's gorgeous, and I never had the courage to ask her out because I considered her out of my league. We know each other, but only as acquaintences. Since I've made my transformation I've gained more confidence. I'm to the point now that I'm ready to start seriously dating girls. I'm tired of being left out and I'm ready to start getting what I want in life. I really want to ask this girl out, but I wonder if her opinion of me was set when she knew me from before. If she sees me know as a leaner, socially stronger guy, is it possible that she would re-evaluate me as a guy, or will she always see me as the guy I used to be?
I just wonder if girls see guys differently when we change ourselves or if once labeled we carry that mark forever.
I guess the answer is that it's possible for girls to change their view on a guy, but my question is, is it likely? In other words, how difficult is it for a guy to change his aura? If girls saw me as a fat 'beta male' before, is it possible for them to now see the leaner me as an 'alpha male'?
I think it is awesome that you're working on bettering yourself! Weather you're skinny, fat, muscle-headed or athletic good women will judge you first on your personality! I used to be 230lbs and not very confident and now I'm 140lbs and I've became more confident in myself inside and out. I always worry people who knew me before hand would still see this 'fat girl' But I think have living both ways it humbles you and hopefully she will see your personality first.
If you don't mind people go answer my question. It would be a big help! :-)
Your entire question is on the presumption she sees you the way you saw yourself. If it is about gaining the confidence to feel you can now ask her out, then all the praise to you - but remember, this is your own perception. She may never have seen you negatively.
I've never been a materialistic girl so I can't speak for girls who judge looks at the top of their criteria. To me, it has always been less about the physical appearance and more about the confidence. I would hope most girls could agree with me.
And no, no label sticks. Just like respect, when lost it can always be regained.
I think, even though she knew you from before, that her perception of you has changed. It sure has, and not only in the "he´s really attractive and fit now"- physical kinda way-(which is great to btw) but also it shows everybody else and not just her that you became constant, responsable, disciplined, interested in how you look and in your own well-being. The fact that you are now working out shows you take care of yourself, and that on its own is attractive. Also doing so gives you confidence and thats great. So yeah i think you should definitely ask her out