There's this girl in one of my classes. She seems really shy when it comes to interacting with people but incredibly confident when it comes to her studies. I find her to be quite interesting and would like to know more about her. The problem is she rushes into class right before it starts and runs out as soon as it ends so I don't really have a chance to converse with her. I've noticed that I think about her when she isn't around and I barely know her so it's strange and new to me lol
What would be the best way to pull her aside so to speak and start interacting with her? Maybe shy women on G@G could shed some light on this because I've always been more into bold women who are stellar conversationalists. It's different coming at it from the other side and I lack experience with it.
Thanks in advance for your advice :)
Okay so I failed today because we both walked in separate directions after class lol Apparently she uses different parking lots. Anyway I won't make the same mistake Thursday! Thanks for everyone's help.
well I'm not a shy woman but i guess i can help in that sometimes i just duck in and out of class as well. u might want to take a seat next to her one session. u dont even have to speak to her at that point. just make some kind of gesture that makes her feel she isn't some kind of geek or invisible person that no one notices. many shy girls tend to feel that way. a simple "hi, can i sit here?" is fine.
as soon as the class is over, you'll b right next to her, if i were u id make a comment about the class itself. "that was pretty interesting/boring" or something. whatever u come up with. quickly followed by "sorry i didn't get your name. I'm..." *extend handshake*. whatever her reply is, leave it there for the first interaction. obviously this is just a rough scenario lol.
anyway, if there's one thing u take away from this, it's that shy girls need time, so youd have to be pretty persistent if u really wanna know more about her, because chances r, there's something quite wonderful hiding beneath the shyness. always is.
I notice people tend to stay in the same seats in my college classes... so if she's one of those people just start sitting next to her and strike up a conversation.
You say she's really confident with her studies so try talking to her about something related to school (what she wants to do career wise/ a test coming up etc)... if she's comfortable with that topic, she's more likely to warm up to you over time. As time goes by you start joking, asking about her day or plans for the weekend... simple things... and even invite her to study with you one of those days.
Interrupt, start conversations, make remarks and don't give up until she relaxes around you and starts returning your gestures. You must be persistent and you can find any excuse to talk from asking for something, making remarks on something you notice about her, all the way up to talking about class.
No secret to it. Interrupt, speak, ask, speak, repeat. Once she's smiling glad to see you, once she wants to share more than just casual chatting, ask her to go out with you.
Don't make a big deal about your approach to her, and try to make it as low-key and one on one as possible. Like don't freak her out and back her into a dark corner or anything, but if you notice someone is already speaking to her then don't approach at that time.
I know for me, I'm a lot more comfortable talking to someone when we're one-on-one and other people aren't noticeably paying attention to our conversation. When I know there's an audience, I clam up and get all blushy and uncomfortable.
Shy person who rushes in and out of class right here!
I would want you to talk to me when a few people are around. Maybe go to class a little earlier or ask her after class (quickly, sprint like Bolt!) and ask her to a campus function (movie, free food event, etc) Get close to her. Sit next her if you can, I know it can be hard with favored seats. But try. Try anything.
I would rather a guy be forward. Then everyone knows everything from the beginning.
What's the classroom set-up like? What I mean is, does everyone sit in the same spot every class, or is it a setting where you could go up to her and say, "Do you mind if I sit here?" and sit next to her?
Try sitting close to her in class, maybe comment about something that has to do with the class at first, get her attention? But whatever you do, don't be daunted if all you get the first few times is a quick smile or something. Chances are, she's unsure of how to react around you but show her that you're willing to keep talking to her and maybe she'll stick around and open up.
Does she sit at the same spot ever time? If so, sit next to her. Even if she sits at a different spot get in class a bit later to find where she is sitting and get near her. When you do, try to initiate a conversation with her. Some convo starters are asking to borrow a school supplies like a pen or paper. You can also ask her about some lecture stuff as well. Then when she opens up, you can have deeper convos with her her and also have her number. You can always use the excuse of being her study buddy to get her number.
Just talk to her. Call her by her name. If she's rushing out just catch her in time and be forward with wanting to get to kmow her more. With shy people you have to be at least somewhat outgoing and direct. Be friendly.
sneak up behind her grab her from behind an cover her mouth and whisper in her ear Keep quiet!.. jkjk just talk to her ask her if she has any interests approaching a shy girl should be treated like approaching a bunny or a squirrel be gentle and nice and try not to look scary
I'm super shy when in group settings and if it were me I would want you to maybe say a few thing things to me here and there, just chit-chat-shit, so that I understand that you are interested in getting to know me (so many people love to just fuck with shy people a few times and then never talk to them again-so don't be joking around unless its about other people or other things). maybe after a few chats with her say "you super cool" or something so she knows that you... think she's cool and maybe like her as a friend. When ever someone is talking to me I'm like omg I'm boring them omg omg omg so just let her know she's not then she will start to talk more and more.
I'm shy, and I do the same thing -- rushing in and out of class, haha. To be honest, I actually like getting approached when it's in a friendly, genuine way.
I'm not sure about speeding up to her after class as that might seem a little... forced, but I think if you ever randomly come across her on campus you should talk to her, tell her you recognize her from class, introduce yourself, etc.
K... I have used this when I was in University. Buy two smoothies, both different kinds. Sit down next to her and say... they messed up my order, would you like one?
Give her the smoothie and it breaks the ice. You give her a little something that brightens up her day and then she will feel somewhat obligated/warmed up to you enough to talk to you after class is over... or if she is b-lining to another class, then she may ask you to meet somewhere later on.
Uh oh. Red Thread tryna stick his hand (or dick) in the cookie jar huh? Watch this get deleted lol.
A girl in my class when I was in college would leave fast too, but she'd come in at different times. She wasn't shy either. Just shy when it came to me.
Maybe you should give her signs that you're into her? That way she'll know and you won't shock her, because I'm shy myself and I know there have been times where a girl would show interest in me all of a sudden and it would shock me. I'm not a girl, but maybe it's kinda the same.