Should I believe him?

I found a message from my boyfriend's ex asking to get back together and he said he had to figure things out first, then proceeded to ignore all other messages from her. I confronted him about it and he said he didn't want to be an asshole to her and that he would never leave me and that he loves me more than anything.
I already know it is hard for him to be mean and to say no to people, but I also think saying no isn't even that mean especially if you are dating someone. Should I believe him?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sometimes saying no, can be one of the hardest things to do, just give him the benefit of the doubt

    • Yeah, I believe he deserves it. I just find it easy to tell others no and can't always expect others to feel the same.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Meh, jealousy is a useless emotion. The only thing that jealousy indicates is how insecure you are. It says nothing about your boyfriend.

    If you have a man that’s untrustworthy, then he shouldn’t be your boyfriend. If he’s your boyfriend, then you have no choice but to trust him completely.

    If you don’t trust him because you’re insecure about his friendship with his ex, you’re only going to accomplish the following:

    1-) You’ll make him feel like crap because his own girlfriend doesn’t trust him.
    2-) You’ll make him feel trapped because he’s dating someone who reads his text messages.
    3-) You’ll make him feel that he can’t be honest with you about his friendship with his ex because he can't.
    4-) You’ll make him feel that he can find a woman who does trust him.
    5-) You’ll make him feel that he can’t be himself around you, which is the highest compliment a man can give to a woman.

    Trust is the foundation of any relationship, and if you don’t have it, you don’t really have anything.

    Good luck.

    • I trust him and have never been through his phone and I dont know any of his passwords, this happened when it was a login mixup on the facebook app. After I clicked on the message icon and saw it was his profile, I was gonna log out but the message from his ex caught my eye. I apologized for invading his privacy and he isn't upset with me at all

What Guys Said 1

  • How did you find this message, and how do you know he ignored the other messages? Were you going through his phone messages?

    You can believe him. Can he believe you? Usually people who snoop are the ones with the most to hide.

    • It is a long story but I have never felt the need to go through his messages. This one happened because the facebook app on my phone was messing up and I logged out. He had his information on my phone when he logged in on it once. So it logged in under his profile and before I realized it was his I pressed the message icon. I was gonna log out after seeing that it wasn't my profile but the seeing a message from his ex made me curious. It was the only message I looked at.

What Girls Said 1

  • I would believe him, especially if he has a hard time doing things that he thinks are mean to other people. Talking to your ex about stuff like that can be an emotional nightmare, especially if you have moved on and they have not. He probably just did not want to upset her more than he had to.

    • You're right. I just find it easy to do because I am not close with any of my ex boyfriends and I love this guy with all of my heart so I would gladly take my ex being upset with me than my boyfriend.

    • That is very true, and I understand how you feel. For me, I would much rather have my ex mad at me than my significant other, and I could be brutally honest and maybe even a little bit mean if I thought that my ex's comment would upset the person who I love. I really wish you two the best, and that is wonderful to hear that you feel so strongly about him <3

    • Thanks :) I have a good feeling that everything is gonna be ok.