Women, have you ever approached a man?

I ask because it seems to me that despite the feminist movement and what have you, there is still an expectation placed on guys to do all the chasing. More often than not it is the guy who asks the girl out rather the other way around. Women might drop some subtle (or not so subtle) hints that they like a man but generally they wait for him to approach them. I'm not saying this is right or wrong, it's just something I've observed.

I'm curious, for those of you in relationships, was it you or your boyfriend/husband who did the approaching? For the single women, did you approach any of your ex's or would you consider doing it in the future?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I approach men all the time. I approached my current boyfriend, that's why we are together. :)

    But you are correct, most women tend to sit back and wait for the guy to do all the work. Far too often these women complain about not finding a boyfriend, too.

    I try to encourage women to make the first move.

    • I won't lie, I wish more women were like you. It's really hard being a shy guy in a society that expects men to initiate everything on the dating front. I can understand the reasons for this, tradition and all that, but it would be nice to see more women doing the approaching bit.

    • I hear that a lot. I know how hard it is for shy guys. Being expected to make the first move, but not being able to do it because of your shyness must be hard.

      Women making the first move is becoming more and more common and accepted these days, I'm sure a woman will eventually come along and ask you out. Good luck!

    • I honestly think that if more women asked men out it would give a lot of shy guys a confidence boost. If women actively showed an interest in them, then they might not be so reluctant to do the asking in the future.

      I think you're right about it becoming more acceptable and I would hazard a guess it's more common now than 20 or 30 years ago, which is a good start.

What Girls Said 2

  • My boyfriend approached me, I guess. I was the one that got us interacting more outside of school, but he was the one that finally came out with it after I'd had a crush on him for four years and asked me to go out with him. The whole thing was less about gender roles and an expectation on him as a guy and more about the fact that I was so incredibly shy, I would never have been able to do it. I was 15, I've grown up quite a bit since then, so I probably would be more willing to approach the other person now.

  • I've approached many guys, but it's always either for my friend or to ask them a question, not to ask them out myself.