Online dating is a waste of time, wouldn't you agree?

I honestly do much better in real life, than I do on online dating. I mean I honestly feel like I am wasting my time whenever I go to online dating. No ladies EVER respond, you can write the most eloqutte letter to them and its like it doesn't even matter. So to me its a waste of time.

Maybe what I read online the other day about online dating is true, if you don't make over a $100k or aren't a 9 out of 10, then ladies just aren't going to respond, do you agree or disagree with that statement? Why or why not?

I personally after spending what little time I have on it, tend to believe its true.

Also personally, I doubt that I will ever go back and if I do it probably won't be for a long time and this is the problem if girls don't respond then guys aren't going to waste their time looking.

Updates:
well to me I just think I do way better in real life than I have ever have in online dating, I mean in my line of work I seem to attract very beautiful women all the time, but nothing real serious, I will say that finding a relationship has never been my number one priority, for one I am very goal/success driven, which doesn't leave much time for dating or anything like that. Plus every single time I get a girl that finds me attractive, I seem to always say the wrong thing or push too hard.
con't so therefore me finding a good woman and making it last, seems to be very difficult. Hence is why I tried online dating, I feel like that is even more of a waste of time. So hence is the reason for my question. In fact I'm to the point where I'm just sick of the dating life and don't want to even try, which when I do this I just throw myself into my career/schooling and don't even bother looking for a girlfriend. I mean granted I am a bigger guy, but if that seriously was an issue then...

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Dude, I have so much better luck online than I do in real life. Dudes in real life are too intimidated by me. That's what RBF does for a girl.

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    • I'm typically not intimidated by any girl, I have almost Always dated really attractive chics, but I don't know if their damaged goods or both of us are, or what it is, but it never seems to last, another problem, I have had is when a girl who knows she is really attractive but yet still has wondering eyes. I just don't get chics like that.

    • But a woman who is so insecure that she thinks she's ugly when she's not is better? Yeah, dude, I'm an engineer, I have multiple degrees, I speak multiple languages and play multiple instruments. If I didn't know me, I would be intimidated by me. Plus, online dating allows me to judge people physically from the comfort of my pajamas.

    • I am highly intelligent myself and I often wonder if women are intimidated by me. But no that wouldn't intimidate me at all bc I know that we all have our strengths and weaknesses.

Most Helpful Guy

  • ... online dating only works for males who have $$$$ and are 10's. I agree, but I also want to add that there are several 10s messaging 1 girl at the same time-which is why women are so selective on there.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Yes, I think dating sites are a waste of time. It’s not that nobody ever meets and falls in love, but it seems set up to increase failure, not success.

    :/

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  • I Married a man from Egypt who Found me on Facebook and Traveled to God's Country... When I closed down my computer curtain.
    It's "Off line" that it Determines How it Ends up with either Being a Success or even a Failure... And this little thing called Fate on your Plate with a Mate.
    Good luck. xx

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  • online dating is a big disadvantage for most guys. sorry but it's true. as girls, we get messaged all the time

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  • I disagree. Overall, I'd rate online dating as a "good thing". I have met my husband-to-be on an online dating site . By the way, online dating gave me a lot of confidence and made me feel more comfortable with dating in general.

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  • Not everyone has luck online. If you feel like you do better in real life then I would stick to that. I personally have a hard, if not impossible time meeting people in real life.

    Anyone I meet is already married, already has kids or isn't interested in me. I am not the best looking girl, but I am super sweet and kind and very easy going. I like to think I'm easy to get a long with and people have told me I am very approachable. However I have little to no success in real life. So online is really the only way I can even meet men.

    But it's frustrating as hell!! I hear ya, no one answers their messages. I understand most men do not find me attractive. I get that. But I've had lots of compliments and guys always look at me when I'm out and about. But I never get hit on or anything.

    Online dating has helped me get a few relationships and for that I am grateful. But It's definitely not for everyone. I know how frustrating it can be. I get a lot of stupid messages and messages that I won't respond to because I don't know how to respond to them.

    I get a lot of trolls. Couples looking for someone extra to spice things up. I'm not up for that, when I was online I was looking for a boyfriend. I was lucky in that my boyfriend messaged me and saved me from online! I was so grateful and love him so much!

    I'm a bigger girl and I find it to be a challenge online. I get harassed, told to die or kill myself or fetishized. It's not fun. But I stuck it out because I'm a hopeless romantic.

    There ARE women who do not just want guys for their money. I'm one of the good ones. But I get overlooked a lot. Perhaps it's who you are looking for? I'm all about attraction, but sometimes you have to be more open minded. If you only go for the hottest girls, then you may have to change your standards a bit.

    Sometimes people can be too picky. Like for instance if a girl likes Mexican food and you don't. Don't just rule her out over that one thing. Perhaps she doesn't eat it much. Maybe she really loves Italian food, and you do too. There may be other things to bond with if there are some things that aren't ideal.

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    • See I am a larger guy but I have very broad shoulders and a stocky frame, so it seems like women seem to like that, bc I get hit on almost every single time I go to work. I mean I always thought that girls didn't like big guys, but when I started to work with the public I am finding that this isn't true at all, so I am really surprised and not used to all of the attention that I have been getting here lately in real life, but I have no luck in online dating and tbh I'm not going that route anymore. Its just a total waste of time in my opinion.

    • And tbh I've ALWAYS dated very attractive women, with the exception of maybe 3-or 4 but for the most part I've always dated very attractive women, but see I really don't find myself all that attractive, but I'm starting to think that is a lie that I used to believe, especially now that I work with the public.

    • I have the same body type, but I'm a woman. I have broad shoulders and widish hips. I find I get some attention from men, but not really anything in person. Women definitely like guys who have broad shoulders and stocky frames. My boyfriend has that body type and I think he is sexy as hell! If you have more success in person, then I would definitely go that route. I wouldn't waste my time on a website that seems to offer nothing to you. Some people find success online and other's don't. My friend met her fiancee online and I met my boyfriend online. It just really depends on the person.

  • I disagree about making over $100k...

    what I read about in the bio is his personality and his favorites books and hobbies, not how much money he's making.
    Not all girl is a gold digger

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  • same, i don't feel like online relationships r rlly tru. anyone can project a perfect image of themselves online,,, online dating is just one big lie. it never lasts either.

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    • ... you as a WOMAN feel that way only because you're ugly, because in all reality women (average to above average ) are getting bombarded with messages on a daily basis.

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    • I'm still with the last person I met online almost eight years ago.

    • @slatyb that v cool, its good that makes you happy. but nothing lasts, because of death.

What Guys Said 5

  • Here's my experience:

    I met my first wife at my place of employment.
    She cheated on me and was generally fucked up in so many ways that I regarded that I had proven myself to be incompetent at the task of selecting a mate.

    So, inspired by the common business practice...
    I outsourced my non core competency.

    Circumstances at the time:
    - divorced father with custody of my 4 year old son
    - working in an all male, industrial environment
    - working swing shift including weekend days
    - attending college (most of the female students were nearly young enough to be my child or they were married, sometimes both were true)
    One more thing...
    - I'm as introverted a person as you have ever seen.

    So...

    The week my divorce became final, I joined eHarmony with a one year membership. Seven months and many matches/dates later, I was matched with a lovely, extremely compatible woman. We were married 9 years ago this June. She has two children from a prior marriage, and I of course brought my son with me. This last decade has been the happiest and most content period of my life.

    No doubt at all.

    Had online dating been an option before I met my first wife. My first marriage & divorce would never have happened. A lot of pain could have been avoided through the wise application of technology.

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  • Online dating worked for me, I met my partner online almost eight years ago and these have been the best years of my life. There is no way we would have met otherwise. I have no idea about response rates based on income or appearance. I wrote to very few women and got replies from most. But before I met my girlfriend, I had a summer with seventeen first dates and no second dates.

    Realistically, if you are average nice guy with average looks, with a five figure income, you are probably not going to get a response from the hottest women on the site. They are getting a hundred messages per day. It's also possible that the women you want to meet are just not the type who do online dating. Good luck.

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  • It's like browsing on Amazon. Most of the people seem desperate. Likeable, attractive people who have something going for themselves don't have to go to great lengths to drum up dates. Usually, they have plenty of mates/suitors to choose from. If you're not likeable or attractive, putting yourself up for auction on a dating site won't change that. Plus, your only options will be people in the same predicament as you. It just seems like a world of shit to me. I'd rather be alone than submit myself to that kind of indignity.

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  • You might be right.

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  • I agree. I got one response in 6 months, and she turned out to be a sociopath. I have no problems IRL.

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