I lied about being a virgin and I want to be honest with her but afraid, should I tell her?

I've known my long distance girlfriend for at least a year and just recently a few months ago got into a relationship. Initially when we had first met, when the quesiton came up of whether I was a virgin or not, I had lied saying no cuz I didn't really want her thinking any less of me for it and also i guess just social pressure in general, afraid of being made fun of for being one and such. I've also had to lie everytime the topic came up and even had to make up stories of who i lost it with. I feel horrible for doing it and regret it. We've been dating for a while now and I'm finally gonna meet her in a month, the chances are that we're gonna sleep together. Should I tell her now that i lied about being virgin way back then, wait til we meet in person and tell her before anything happens, or not tell her at all?

(btw she's also a virgin) I'm afraid of telling her cuz the #1 thing she hates the most is lying, she's been lied to by many people in her past and such. I dont want to potentially lose something great over a stupid lie i shouldn't have done. help please, i dont want to have this lie between us but i dont want to lose her trust.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Tell her before you guys meet. I don't think it's good to have any surprises when you finally meet in person.

    Be honest like you are here, and tell her you were afraid she'd think less of you if you told her you were still a virgin. You could add something like, "I'm so sorry about not being honest about it in the first place, I hope you can forgive me. You're amazing, and I'd hate to lose you over a pointless lie I chose to make a year ago. Biggest regret."

    Hopefully she'll understand. She may even like the fact that you're still a virgin (because then you guys can lose it together, making the experience extra special), but then again she may feel a bit put off by the dishonesty. Since you guys like each other enough to be in a long distance relationship, chances are she will forgive you.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Of course you should go and tell her. This time tell her the truth. Please never lie to a woman, never break a woman's trust by lying to her, lying is a very bad habit and once a person starts lying the person finds it hard to stop, so I would suggest stop hiding the truth, stop lying to her and tell her the truth.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

What Guys Said 2

  • Welp. Lies tend to lead to other lies, and a lie between lovers tends to fester. Just fall on your sword and tell her. Make sure you appear genuinely contrite and upset over what you did, though. She might be mad, but she might also understand and forgive. You'll just have to see what happens

  • Just be truthful. No relationships should be based on a lie. There's a small chance that she might like it if you're a virgin so try telling her before she finds out herself.