I usually have good, platonic friendships with guys. As the years go by its getting harder and harder to maintain them because some kind of romance forms. My major and future career requires me to be around guys all the time. I may want to stay single and if I get into a relationship I don't want someone else to jeopardize it for me. Is it possible? Can girls and guys maintain a platonic relationship?
Most Helpful Guy
Just like any other relationship, platonic relationships have got their own challenges. It can be very hard to maintain a platonic relationship without having some feeling for your friend. The more time you spend with a member of the opposite sex the more you grow to love them and appreciate them. You might even start seeing them attractive and start having imagination of how the two of you would look like if you were together. You might even go ahead and ask your platonic friend if you can stop being just friends and start being more. Your platonic friend might not take it nicely and you might end up loosing a great friendship.
Your partner might not get it that what you have with your friend is just a platonic relationship and nothing else to it. They might even try to break you up with your friend. You are then left to choose between your partner and your friend which is a hard thing to do. If you choose not to break up with your platonic friend it could be reason enough for you and your partner to have constant fights. Your friends too might not accept that what the two of you have is just pure friendship and nothing else. You will constantly have to explain to everyone around you that the two of you are just friends who like any other friends in the world share each other's joy and sorrow and that you enjoy each other's company.
In a platonic relationship, you might encounter a problem of drawing a boundary when it comes to sex. In a platonic relationship, the partners might find it hard to resist their sexual desires. This is particularly hard if the two of you are single and your sexual desires are not met. You might all decide to indulge in sexual pleasures forgetting that your friendship was not based on sex in the first place. It might also happen that the other person does not quite approve of this and you end up loosing your friendship. You are left with constant fear of telling your platonic friend the truth because you do not want to loose them. At the same time you are being dishonest to your friend.
You cannot totally be free to treat a platonic relationship like you would any other friendship. You are left worrying about how your friend will interpret a certain gesture. You could have done it out of a friendship point of view but your friend totally misinterprets you. For example, you can hug and kiss a friend every time you meet with them in a public place. When it comes to a platonic friend you become a little preserved about it. This is because you worry about what your friend will think and say and at the same time you are not so sure what kind of message you are sending to your platonic friend. They could interpret the kisses and hugs as a go on and be my boyfriend or girlfriend.
- Harvey D1