i really like this girl. we get along really good and when we are together its mostly playful and fun but i dont think i am good boyfriend material. i am sweet to them and stuff but i never want to do boyfriend girlfriend things.
i dont like going out to eat, i dont like going to parties or to weddings her family get togethers etc. i get nervous thinking about meeting her friends and family. basicly im introverted. i want the love part of relationship but i dont feel like i will ever be comfortable doing these things. should i explain this to her?
Relationships are about compromising. If you can't compromise then you don't really want a relationship, you want all the benefits of one but you don't really WANT one. If you really wanted to be with this girl, you wouldn't mind meeting her friends/family every once in a while, you wouldn't mind doing stuff she likes, such as going out to eat. Because the important part here is that you're doing something with her, you're BEING with her. Likewise, she shouldn't expect you to want to come with her every single time. It's give and take.
Relationships aren't all about what you don't or do want to do. They are a compromise because 2 people won't agree all the time. Basically it's okay that you're different but you can't be steadfast in only what you want to do. You should be happy sharing some things with her even if it isn't your first choice of what to do. Compromise and understanding make you a good boyfriend.
Definitely explain how you feel to her. She'll hopefully be understanding with how you feel, and either leave it be or try to slowly ease you in. Most people are uneasy about spending time at family functions when they first get into a relationship with someone, or even just meeting them. Same goes with meeting their friends.
That sounds pretty normal. I know the first time I went to my boyfriend's for a family dinner, I was more nervous than I would be for exam. Convinced I'd make a horrible first impression. Truth be told, all most families really care about is that you make their son/daughter/whoever happy. Be polite, a bit of small talk and you're good.
The only thing stopping you from being in a relationship are your own irrational fears. If you really wanted, you could totally fight through them and get the girl. :)
You have to be straight up so she can decide if this is going to be a good fit for her, but you have to be ready for her to back off when you do. It's the right thing to do though, especially if you care about her, because leading her on wouldn't be fair.
Honeslty just talk to her about it. Just tell her you are worried that you won't be a good boy friends. Tell her to let you know if she ever has thoughts about it. If she likes you, which it looks like she already does then she probably already sees and understands that you don't like those things! Don't feel awkward or afraid to talk to her about it, odds are she already knows and totally gets it!
Yes you should talk to her about it. If she likes you she won't mind. But you will eventually have to meet her friends and family. It sucks but they will assume she's making you up if you don't do it one day.
start doing stuff without her. When she questions you, tell her that you're sick of her getting mad and being irrational. When she says that you're not playing games and that won't take her shit, she'll change her tune. Girls think their tough until a guy can top them. Chances are she'll see that you're not playing and rethink trying to fake end the relationship over stupid stuff.
I think you should wait until you are ready. I respect guys who are true with there feelings rather than play with a girl. you are a gentlemen
I'm also introverted and struggle when I have to go to my boyfriends family events. If she wants you to and you love her, you should go, and you'll realize it's not as scary as it seems. Even if you try talking to her about it, maybe she'll understand.
I'm introverted myself but, dude, don't set yourself up with that attitude. If anyone's going to decide whether you're good for her or not, it's going to be her. Yea, sure, explain your situation but explain it in a informative way instead of coming up with excuses.
I think the best solution here would be to try to start getting comfortable with these get togethers and family meets. If you plan on getting married in the future, you are going to have to encounter these situations. It maybe awkward and uncomfortable for you to meet new people but if you keep forcing yourself into these situations you will start to build confidence and be comfortable with any new person you meet.