HOW THE HELL DO PEOPLE DATE THIS IS SO COMPLICATED?

I met someone (pete) who is really cool and seem like someone I could hang out with and have a flirtationship with but I've been seeing someone else We aren’t official and I don’t know if we will ever be in a relationship but when this new guy asked me out for dinner I said yes and I feel like shit.

I’ve known dan since I was 13 years old and I remember the first time I saw him something clicked in the back of my mind. We just reconnected this summer (it’s been 7/8 years) and I’m so head over heels for him. We spent summer together watching baseball or going out with our dogs or to dinner or to his friends houses. Now he’s at school five hours away. I visit on a regular basis and he comes home when he can. I’ve kissed three guys in my life because I’m just that type - I can’t commit. He’s number three. He’s told me he likes me but omfg we aren’t in middle school anymore.

I want to know what we are I want to establish level ground with dan. But at the same time we are friends hanging out, right? I feel like that’s just me lying to myself but we verbally have not settled anything. I mean we sleep next to each other and we cuddle hard core which 99% of the time is all him. But we aren’t official..

I don’t want to see other people though! But I don’t want to be some sad fuck mooning over someone who hasn’t DTR’d with me. God dammit I hate relationships they are so much work.

I feel weird about going to dinner with Pete but at the same time I feel like I need to. I don’t really want to get involved-involved with him I think it would be fun and a experience. I’m 20 so that’s what I should be doing but stupid Dan.

I don’t want to fuck any type of relationship up with Dan, but I mean we aren’t official we aren’t a couple so I can go on this date with Pete right? But what happens if Dan and I finally DTR? Like how do I tell Pete this if we start seeing each other on a regular basis? I need to tell Pete about Dan because that’s only fair but how do I do that?


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What Guys Said 1

  • You are way over thinking this.

    You are not in a relationship with Dan. You don't owe it to him to not go out with Pete. If you want to do it, then do it... do what you are comfortable with.

    You also don't owe Pete anymore of an explanation other than you are or are not interested. You haven't even gone out with him yet and going out with him once or twice doesn't mean you owe more than that.

    Yes, relationships are work, just wait it gets much worse... lol.

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