Guys, Honestly, would it put you off if a girl you were dating told you about being sexually assaulted in the past?

If it happened more than once too.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes and no. I was sort of involved with a girl who was sexually assaulted by a relative of hers at a young age and it affected her. She has always had trouble keeping relationships. She's felt her only worth was through sex when, in reality, she's a smart young women with a bright future ahead of her. I always told her that with the utmost sincerity and she doubted me every time and it was exhausting. After doing some research, I found this to be somewhat common.

    Not every guy will run away if he finds out that his girlfriend or a girl he's dating went through this. Some might not even know how to take it. But the important thing is, you be honest with him and if he truly cares for you, he won't care about that. He'll make do what it takes to earn your trust and build a strong, healthy relationship with you.

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What Guys Said 4

  • One of my friends told me she had been twice before, we weren't in a relationship or anything but we were still pretty close. I'm a very accepting person so I certainly didn't think less of her for it. It's not like it was her fault, so why should I be mad at her for it? It took her a lot of courage to tell me those things as she doesn't normally talk about it, but really I guess it just made us even closer in the end?

    Some guys will probably not like it, but in my opinion those guys aren't worth your time.

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  • Sadly almost every girl I ever talked to has at some point in her life. Become normal to hear, which is sad again. But I dont understand what mean put off?, put off how?

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    • I've read from some guys that it bothers them when they learn the girl they're dating has had sex with a number of people (I know it's not called sex if nonconsensual but I don't know what else to say). I guess I just feel like I'm damaged goods.

    • There is a huge difference between yeah simple sex and practically rape, can't be counted as the same thing. No doubt if a girl slept with loads of guys in a consensual way it can put some guys off, but nonconsensual shouldn't at all. They might get pissed at the people who did it, Know I do, and dosent make me think any less of the girl naturally, she is a victim. I can regardless understand the damaged goods part, always thought of myself the same, even if different reasons. But dont think less of yourself please, nor blame yourself. Too much crap happens in life and sometimes its not a lot you can do about it. If any guy has any problem with you for sharing something that personal or traumatic for that matter they can simply go f**k themselves, they aren't worth your time, just good riddance.

  • Not at all. I don't know how I'd react if she did one of those 'cringe' things you sometimes hear assault/rape victims do, if she were touched by me, however. It would depend on how much she could try to relax her tenseness, but I'd have no problem if it showed gradual progress. by the way my two nieces were almost assaulted by their step-father, and my sister (who caught him in the act) and I were seriously thinking about doing him grave bodily harm, but it was such a notorious thing around the neighborhood, we did nothing except get the cops to charge him, and she filed for divorce. They are fine. My family also adopted a girl whose own father had molested her other sister, and the molested sister totally got over any mistrust of men; and our adoptive sister never really mistrusted men, just that particular asshole. Believe me some men are putzes and don't want to deal with your issue and wouldn't date you, but who would want such an insensitive person to begin with?

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  • If it happened more than once, I would wonder if they were actually rapes or if she had carelessly placed herself in a position that made the result much more likely. Most rape victims become hypervigilant after their first assault and are particularly on guard to make sure it doesn't happen again.

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