So I'm overweight, not terribly but definitely bad, and I am also a nerd with social anxiety. I go to nerd clubs at my college and there aren't many girls there, at least who are single. I use OkCupid, but get next to no responses no matter the message I send. I don't care about appearance, barring extremes, but even chubby girls didn't respond. When girls actually talk to me they seem to enjoy themselves because I'm really quirky, easygoing, and understanding. All that is kind of off topic I guess, but I'm kind of venting while also looking for advice. I've read advice elsewhere that said to go to comic bookstores and stuff like that, but I can't fathom approaching a random girl like that, partially because of social anxiety, but also because it just feels creepy. So yeah, single socially anxious male nerd needs advice on how to find and apporach nerd girls in a non-creepy way.
Most Helpful Girl
No matter how much society tries to coddle us about how it's what's on the inside that counts, the outside matters a whole lot as well.
It really sucks and I'm sorry that you're balding at such a young age. The best thing to do is shave the existing hair. Shave the facial hair as well as it doesn't make for a flattering look with a bald head, especially when you're carrying excess weight.
From your photo I'd say losing around 20kg would be good. This is just a rough estimate based on the fact that the fat around your neck makes it seem like you don't actually have one and your head just kind of fades into your shirt collar.
Getting in shape will make you healthier, make you look better and in turn will increase your confidence.
As for nerd girls, not sure whether you're referring to academically inclined types or if you just want someone who enjoys video games and Doctor Who as much as you do. If it's the latter, then there's loads of those on message boards, fandom related websites, all kinds of conventions, video game stores, etc.
If you DON'T want to change your appearance and are content with how you look, you're gonna have to up your confidence and go to more social events. You have to learn to get yourself out of your comfort zone, otherwise nothing will ever happen. As an introvert I completely understand how tough it can be to go out and socialize, but if you never try - you can't complain about not getting what you want.
Good luck, dude.0
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