I am 22 is it bad I am dating a 41 year old men?

Is this bad to date cuz people say it is


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Most Helpful Guy

  • No we can't help who we fall in love with as long as you're both happy.
    Age is just a number besides it's your private life and has sod all to do with anyone else

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes.

    Three scenarios.
    1. An older spouse can soon become an old spouse needing cared for. When that happens, it's not uncommon for the younger spouse to move on, looking for the youth they've lost.
    2. The older spouse dies, leaving behind a widow (er). If it's been a reasonable length of relationship, the surviving spouse may find it difficult to find a new partner as has happened to a woman I knew, now in her 60s (widow, not especially well-off - and lonely).
    3. I may be cynical, but the wallet size of some of the above could make it appealing to the younger spouse to live in marriage for a goodly number of years then take the older spouse to the cleaners financially. Cynical, moi

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    • In most cases, a large age gap that spans a generation isn't a balance. One person has far more life experience and that takes something away from the younger person. My view is that couples are meant to grow and experience different life stages together, not one playing the father/mother figure. I wouldn't want a partner who didn't share the same references or whose friends were as old as my parents. It robs the younger person of enjoying their youth and discovering things together. Hollywood couples are completely different because their lives evolve at a different rate. However, in the real world only damaged young women who can't get men their own age would ever consider a serious relationship much older man.

What Guys Said 40

  • It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks are you both happy.
    judgmental people will frown on it but what they think is irrelevant.

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  • It's quite an age difference. When you are 35 and looking good he will be pushing 60 and old as hell.

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  • Outta all the guys ur age, why date ur father?

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  • its your life to live how you please and with who you want too

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  • "People" need to mind their own business.

    You're both consenting adults, who can make your own choices, and deal with any consequences.

    If you are enjoying being together, what's the harm?

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  • I'm 25 and married to a 30 year old woman. If you love him and he feels the same why care what others think?

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  • Do you like each other? Do you feel loved, and like he REALLY cares for you?
    If so, why do you care what ANYONE thinks?

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  • It doesn't matter what anyone thinks

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  • It's not at all bad. Enjoy it.

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  • Do your thing if you are happy go for it people have something to say all the time

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  • Who cares what anyone else says. It's only about what you and he think of it.

    If you are thinking long term try this. Picture you and him being 30 years older. So if you are 52 and he is 71 do you still think that's an acceptable age gap? If so just go for it.

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  • Yea its odd, there's one thing common amongs young women that date older men - they seem to have issues connecting with guys their age because it takes work and effort - a guy 41 will literally just like you for your youth so that initial attraction is easy

    I suggest you self reflect on why you are unable to find a man around your age

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  • Fuck the haters... Do what you want.

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  • If I was 41 and I was daring someone your age I wouldn't have a problem with it at all.

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  • Who cares what other people think. My girlfriend is 13 years older than me. I know it is not as much of an age gap as the two of you are but it is enough for people to think that it is wrong which I do not care. As long as you two love each other, care about each other and are there for each other through the bad and good times then who cares.

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  • Just came out of a similar relationship earlier this year. We dated for years and was really great time. (We had gotten serious, talk of future etc)

    Our friends preached it wouldn't work, it was crazy. We were 14 years apart.

    Then one day she woke up and didn't want it any more, i mean like cold bam, out of nowhere.

    Ultimately if you are happy and he is happy go for it.

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  • no way.. girls do like mature men

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  • I question older men who date young women. Something doesn't sit well, has to do with immaturity a lot of the time. Regardless as long as you are happy, go for it.

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  • That is only for you and him to decide. You two are adults. Live your life however you want it.

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  • No its cool. We'll just wait here for your next question with the title ''I thought he loves me but now he's gone. What do I do?''

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    • We been together for 2 years

    • And you're so proud about it that you come here to ask questions whether it is bad or not.

    • I am not proud of it

  • What's your goal here? Long term relationship is going to be hell. If it's just sex... have fun.

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    • Long term

    • How good are you at changing diapers then? It's a 19 year age difference - when you're my age he'll be 72.

      Buuuut... what kind of job does he have? Does he make good money? Are you in love with him and does he treat you the way you deserve?

      I say - it's less than optimum, certainly - but... it really depends on you.

  • Damn, and I thought me thinking about dating a 23 year old (I'm 36) was a large spread.

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  • men? plural?
    yes.

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  • When you learn to use "man" and "men" correctly, all your problems will fade away.

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  • Ya he's to old... how would ur dad feel if u knew u were dating that old man probably older thn ur dad XD

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  • Not at all... he's as young as the woman he feels :-)

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  • Socially it may not be acceptable and i wouldn't date a 22

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  • YES, YES IT IS.

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  • Sounds like you got some hills coming up.

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  • i dont personally agree with it but hey its your choice so go for it

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 18

  • If you have to ask, you know it is.

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  • I don't think it is bad really. At 22 you're not a child. You're old enough to make your own decisions and date whomever you please. So don't listen to what anyone says.

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  • no its perfectly fine

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  • no not really!

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  • i mean its your decision and do what you feel is right, but goddamnnn thats a huge age difference! thats like my sister (who's 21) dating my dad! (who's 40)!!! he's old enough to be your father

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  • Umm.. personally yeah.. it's a bit too old

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  • Do you two have much in common? Perhaps they feel he is taking advantage of you. Your grammar is atrocious so perhaps you give the impression you aren't very bright. It's "man" and "because."

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  • I personally think dating men my age is more appealing. I can start a family and build a life with them.

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  • No it's a good thing that you found a sugar daddy yourself.

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  • You're both consenting adults, who cares?

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  • l don't see anything bad, just dont let him take advantage of you.

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  • I think it's ok

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  • I think it's too much. My maximum would be 37 in the 40s it's too much for me.

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  • If you're not proud of being with him, why are you with him?

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  • If he looks young than 41 I don't see a problem with it. But I do not date men that are that much older than me. The oldest I date is 29. My only exception to that rule is eminem

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  • No, but just remember if you thinking about marrying this guy he'll probably end up dying 20-24 years before you do.

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  • I wouldn't date a man that old. A single man at that age is a red flag in my opinion.
    But if that's what you're into don't let what people say discourage you.

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    • A single woman at any age could be viewed as a red flag :P, if you wanna go that route.

      But i dont, because people are individuals are dont have to adhere to you strict guide on relationships and how to live your life.

    • If that's how you feel you're entitled to your opinion. My opinion is a single 41 year old raises red flags for me. I would never date a man that old and I also advise young women my age not to. If they have to date older men early to mid 30's works out better.

  • Well, whatever floats your boat, girl.

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