Guys, Guy never even pays his own share on a date, what do I do?

Disclaimer: I am an independent woman who doesn't want or expect man to pay for her. I was raised like that, and I mean it when i say it. However, this guy might have gone too far. So we went on a couple of dates, and the first time he offered to pay for a drink but so timidly and barely pulling his wallet out that i just felt bad for him, and i said it's ok it's on me, don't worry. Then after that, for 3-4 more dates, he invited me for 1 beer, while i paid for dinners and drinks. He says ok then the next one is on me. Except, that when the next one happens - it's exactly the same. WTF? He seems to really like me, and I like him too, but this is little too much. If he was my boyfriend, and out of work, of course i wouldn't mind, but he's neither. How do I make him understand he's not supposed to behave like this, without making him feel like s**t? Or do you guys he's not even worth the effort?


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  • This all comes down to communication and expressing yourself. Don't be afraid to tell him that you don't like to pay every single time. I tell girls on the first date that I'm happy to pay the first few times but I'd like to feel like she's also contributing. Sometimes this makes some girls run while others happily accept the challenge. You don't want to date a freeloader so make sure you let him know what your expectations are but don't be pushy about it. Guys hate hearing about how 'independent' girls are. All we hear is selfish. So be gentle when you throw that word out. Remember, this will hep with more than just him paying in the future, it will help you with other things in your future relationship.

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    • Thanks for your advice! I don't even know how to chose words to tel him that i don't like that he never pays for anything, because i think no matter how i say it, he won't feel like a man. Should i just do nothing next time the check comes to the table?

    • No, you need to talk to him before and let him know that you would appreciate it if he paid. This is all based on communication

  • I would leave this guy alone as he should always pay for you. A woman has a lot invested in being beautiful

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    • Haha, maybe then i didn't invest enough :P

    • Understood but being a woman costs a lot starting with Tampons and then clothes and makeup and all the hair supplies it all adds up

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