Japanese foreign exchange girl. she is a puzzle and I can't figure out if she likes me or not?

my friend told me his family will host a Japanese exchange student, well it was the night before school started and I started learning Japanese so I could properly introduce myself, when she came to school the next day, I introduced myself and it went great. she started sitting by me and she smiles when I talk to her, so I figured she likes me. as the weeks go by I finally asked her for her number in Japanese and she smiled and put it in my phone, score right? well i text her later that night and it takes a couple of hours to reply and apologizes for the late reply, well no biggie she was probably busy. so i send a reply and it takes another couple of hours, again she apologizes and i tell her not to worry and i reply again, well again it takes another couple of hours. so i text her for a week and figure out what she likes and all of that jazz, but each reply took her at least 2hrs, there was only 1 night she replied rather quickly. the reply time didn't really bother me until recently when it was almost non existent. but when i was figuring out what she liked, she said she liked to watch basketball, well i thought fantastic, i was going to buy a ticket to the thunder game anyways so i asked her if she would like to go with me and she said she would love to, and i guess she has told her host sister and mother about me because her mother asked me if i could take her home from the hs basketball game, this week couldn't have gotten any better right? well as i mentioned earlier, recently her replies were non existent. it wasn't until i had told her goodnight that she finally replied to my messages. and she seems to be avoiding me a little bit at times. and when we did text it was me doing most of the talking. so it has been bothering me a lot recently, why would she ignore me, take hours to reply then recently not really reply at all, yet agree to go to the thunder game with me, give me her number, and smile when i talk to her.


What Girls Said 1

  • I don't believe she is ignoring you on purpose. You have to remember Japanese have a different cultural upbringing when it comes to dating and relationships. One of the most common thing I have seen is that relationship aren't really acknowledged and there is a lot of politeness. Don't worry so much about the texting. She probably likes actual face to face communication better than texting.

    • true, but I forgot to mention that her host sister added me on fb and immediately messaged me and her first question was how I felt about her. I told her and she said that mitsuki likes me as friend and she kept talking to me. well I thought wow, talk about shot through the heart but the long replies and sort of ignoring me made more sense. but her host sister has a crush on me, so I then thought maybe she was making that up, but im hoping she did make it up because im taking mitsuki out to the thunder game Sunday and was planning on formally asking her out there after the game. so I guess ill find out Sunday.

      also I gave her roses with a note that said "just because I thought you deserved them" and she really liked them, so im getting weird mixed emotions, sometimes it seems like she likes me, other times it seems like im nothing more than a friend.

    • and she doesn't really talk either because she isn't fluent in English, which is understandable. but this really hurts the flirting game. I don't know what to tease her about or talk about because she just recently moved here, its not like flirting with someone I've known for awhile, and there is a language gap. most of our talking is pretty basic, in both English and Japanese. I know it sounds greedy of me, but I want a more complex conversation but due to barrier and the short time knowing her i have no idea what to talk about with her.

    • Keep trying to talk to her.
      While there may be a language barrier keep working at it. Japanese is tough when you first start but it helps when there is a native speaker to help you and this could bring the both of you closer. You can also look online for any Japanese phrases for flirting so she understands your intentions.
      As for her host sister, you should kindly reject her if you are not interested in her because it could possibly lead to problems later on.

What Guys Said 1

  • I met a Japanese girl for business, she seemed to spend more time around or talking to me than was really necessary. She'd stand so close when talking to me it was like she was trying to get into my pocket but I couldn't read her at all. She was just too foreign.