Can you explain and justify what standards you believe are necessary for dating? Sex? Marriage?

Standards are a set of conditions you require to date (marry, have sex with, etc.) someone, which can be set as high or as low as you want. The problem is they come with risks. Higher standards mean fewer options and also increase your chances of not finding anyone. Lower standards mean more options but also increases the likelihood of ending up with someone undesirable. In addition to that, the individuals that exceed your standards also tend to have high standards. The higher their standards are the less likely you are to attract them. So with all of this in mind explain and justify what standards you believe are necessary for dating? Sex? Marriage?

  • Keep standards as high as possible (all or nothing dating)
    0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
  • Keep standards high (Ambitious dating)
    33% (3)25% (1)31% (4)Vote
  • Keep standards high enough to avoid unhealthy relationships (Manageable dating)
    56% (5)75% (3)62% (8)Vote
  • Keep standards low enough to avoid loneliness (Necessity Dating)
    0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
  • Keep standards low (Thrifty dating)
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  • No Standards (Anything you can get dating)
    0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
  • Zero standards zero dating (Non participation dating)
    11% (1)0% (0)7% (1)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think we all need to decide on what our standards are versus are preferences first and foremost: preferring a particular set of physical traits for example is different than EXPECTING them. For me, I have few standards and many preferences, but what I do have for standards are very solid and unwavering:

    I expect a monogamous partner
    I expect him to at least have a job of his own
    I expect him to have similar core values as me (family, ambition, charity, etc)
    I expect him to give his all to our relationship.
    I expect to be attracted to him and for him to be attracted to me.

    That is it. As for all of my preferences, that's too many to list.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You can't be looking for that perfect someone. They will never come, and if you think you've found them then you either don't know them well enough or you're lying to yourself.

    When you have someone you truly love, you are willing to change a bit for them and they are willing to change a bit for you. You take interest in each others pursuits and daily lives and you accept their abnormalities. In fact, you end up loving them.

    It makes me sad to see people say things like "I'm not settling for nothing but the best" or "Don't lower your standard. . . (Dont ask for) something that you know you don't deserve" That's not how love works and these people will never be in a real relationship if they keep thinking like this. When you meet someone, "Standards" should be the last thing on your mind. Ask yourself how these people make you feel. Ask yourself if you agree with their outlooks on life and people. Ask yourself if this person means more to you than yourself. Is this someone who you couldn't stand to see sad? Does their happiness have the ability to flip your whole mood? You'll never be happy if you keep worrying about superficial things like the size of his arms or the way he talks or the job he has.

    Just go out there and meet everyone, be adventurous, don't be scared of rejection, have sex with lots of people and enjoy your life as you look for the person you can be happy with for the rest of your life because if you are in a relationship with someone and you aren't willing to sacrifice a piece of yourself for this person, than you aren't in love with them. You're attached to them and there is a very big difference.

    • you have standards whether or not you want to admit it. You may not call them that but you have them. There's a reason why you're dating some people and not others. There's a reason why you haven't tried to marry every person you've met. Those are standards. Nothing wrong with having them.

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    • No I understood the point I just didn't understand how it answered the question. I agree with what you're saying I'm just unsure of why you said it.

    • Oh, well I saw some of the answers being made, and I felt like I needed to say my piece. If you want a more direct answer,

      I want a girl who knows weather or not she knows who she is. And isn't afraid to be herself or find herself. A girl whose adventurous, someone who wouldn't mind going out to play paintball or even see a movie at the drop of a hat if we both happened to have the energy for it. But I want someone who wouldn't have a problem having a quiet night at home watching Netflix.

      A Girl who has a passion for something would be nice but it's more important that she is down to earth. Don't be a feminist, but realize you can do anything you want without blaming your obstacles on other people. Trust me and be someone who I can trust. Mean what you say to me and talk to me about your problems. I swear I'll listen. Just be someone whose crazy enough to be up for anything, but down to earth enough to see things for what they are and know what's really important.

What Girls Said 2

  • I am not settling for nothing but the best.

  • Don't lower your standard but make sure you're not asking for something that you know you don't deserve. And don't be a hypocrite.


What Guys Said 1

  • For dating she must be attractive to me, this is partly looks, partly style, manner, character and intelligence. To be suitable for marriage in addition to the above she must be even tempered, fair minded, hardworking, trustworthy, capable, rational and have close to the same goals and values as me. She must be something like a good friend as well as a good reliable business partner because a family is very like a business.