Do you think its hypocritical of someone to (only) want to date someone with quality that they dont have themselfs?
For example, a girl expecting the guy she dates to have a good job, but doesn't work herself and barely finished high school. Or s guy Who only wants super fit women, but never goes to the gym nor eats healthy
- YesVote A
- NoVote B
- OtherVote C
Most Helpful Guy
When you get down to it, pretty much everything humans do is hypocritical--most or a lot, anyway. I don't really like that word for a concept like this. I might say, "Are double standards in relation to dating acceptable or good or bad?" Something like that.
As for the meat of the question: It is hypocritical, but that doesn't make it necessarily good or necessarily bad. So long as both like the qualities of the other well enough to where they want to be together, why does it matter? That said, there's definitely a double standard where women need to be super fit and attractive, but not need any other qualities to be desirable; and men need to have good jobs and/or degrees and such to be desirable. That's just a result of our instincts. Females naturally seek protection and provision and long-term survival aspects, particularly for potential offspring; whereas, males naturally respond to that desire and form ambition to create such an environment: e. g. female desire fuels male desire which fuels female desire: not necessarily the same. That's my take, anyway.
Given that protection and provision aren't particularly necessary in the modern age where women can take care of themselves, females, more or less, desire personality and entertainment value more so than the latter; whereas, males simply desire an attractive female who isn't a total bitch, most often. Both might switch it up depending on cognizance and environment--particularly males when seeking a long-term partner, where chemistry plays a bigger role; but, that's the general rule, I believe. The male is viewed as the protector and provider, while the woman is viewed as the child bearer and nurturer--even in modern attempts to equalize everything, this instinctual tendency tends to exert itself here and there. While that's certainly not equal, it's just the way it is. Human behavior tends to be based on emotion and instinct, intermingled with rational thought, in my opinion. So, those are bound to conflict and turn someone into a hypocrite. When you mix emotions and the rational brain, they're going to conflict.
Instinct has it's own logic and purpose, even if it's not exactly rational to the conscious mind. We only seek out what is most beneficial to us, and others to them. So, hypocritical yes, but not necessarily wrong or bad; a definitive double standard, however, which is sort of antithetical to Western equalist morality.0
Most Helpful Girl
For some things yes. However if it's a personality trait then no, because I usually go for people who have different traits to me and often learn from them. For example confidence or generosity or trusting etc... For things like jobs and fitness yes I do think it's hypocritical.0